


Insubordination

by theimaginesyouneveraskedfor



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Dark Steve Rogers, Dark!Steve, F/M, he's the fucking Captain baby, like I'm saying don't fuck with him, or he'll fuck with you, very angry very dark steve
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-09
Updated: 2019-06-24
Packaged: 2020-01-07 09:12:10
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 6
Words: 25,210
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18407576
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/theimaginesyouneveraskedfor/pseuds/theimaginesyouneveraskedfor
Summary: After the events of Civil War, Steve and his team are stuck in their compound. Following a mission, you disagree with your stalwart leader but he does not take kindly to your defiance.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks to everyone who reads this and the anon who requested it. I hope it meets your expectations. I am excited, this is my first dark!one shot and featuring our very own Steverino Rogers. Tell me what you think in the comments.

Steve had been silent since your return, even on the jet he had sat stewing in anger, you and Nat bracing yourselves for the storm. His broad shoulders were stiff, his back to you in his seat as his posture foretold his temperament. He still hadn’t dropped the attitude, leading you and Nat through the halls into the briefing room, waiting for you to enter before slamming the door.  You stood in the briefing room, arms crossed, hip cocked, jaw clenched. You stood waiting for him, arms crossed, hip cocked, jaw clenched. He huffed, walking around to the head of the long table, pacing as if you weren’t there. And so you prepared for his wrath, your own irritation rising.

Finally he stopped. He twisted sharply to face you and Nat, smacking his palms down on the table. As of late, this behaviour was not unusual. You were growing used to the sudden flip of the coin. Before, Steve had ever been the golden saviour but since your exile he had grown sullen; resentful of those who had chased him out. You and the rest of the team were the only targets he had to take his ire out on but you had faced worse. You had learned long ago to steel yourself against angry men.

“Fuck, Y/N,” he jabbed his finger in the air towards you, “I gave you an order!”

“A stupid one,” you snapped, “If I had listened to you, I’d have a broken leg right now or worse. And that civilian would be dead.”

He snarled. “This isn’t a dialogue. I am your captain and you listen when I tell you to do something.”

“Not if it could mean my life. Or another’s.” You shook your head and dropped your arms, hands settling on your hips, “Your the one who taught me to follow my gut.”

“I also  _tried_  to teach you common sense,” he rebuked, “But some things you just can’t learn.”

“Steve,” Nat’s dusky voice cut through the tension, “She’s right. She had to do it. You cant expect her to just throw herself towards certain death.”

“And you,” he turned on Nat, “You always have to encourage her. The two of you are stubborn as hell. This is a team and we need to work together if we’re going to make it. Understood?” Nat sighed but didn’t respond. She had taken to keeping silent against the jaded super soldier. They all had.

“You mean we have to jump when you say so,” you scoffed, “How high, Captain?”

He pushed himself from the table, a scowl tightening his lips. He tilted his head slightly as he narrowed his eyes, mulling over your remark. He marched around the table and towards you, his chest rising as he planted himself in front of you. Your head barely reached his shoulders but you returned his glare in kind.

You saw the tic in his jaw, the one that appeared when he was most agitated. Your heart sped up but you kept your veneer. “Fine, next time you can stay home.”

“Are you–are you suspending me?” Your mouth fell open. Missions were the only thing that kept you sane these days. You were going stir crazy in the compound and your occasional sojourns outside were all you had to look forward to.

“We can call it that,” his voice was dangerous. You heard the leather of his gloves strain as his hands turned to a fist. “You’re recklessness is too risky. You put the whole team in danger.”

“You put the team in danger. Your arrogance, your stubbornness.” You retorted, your brow drawn together in your anger. You were sure you looked like a wild animal. “Sometimes I think that you were compensating for something with that shield of yours because ever since you gave it up, you’ve been a complete jackass!”

Steve’s blue eyes dilated. You could sense the struggle within to restrain himself. Nat’s hand rested on his arm and the sudden reminder of her presence jolted you. “You both need to cool down,” she warned, “We shouldn’t be fighting each other.”

Steve stared down at you, his bottom lip bulged as he ran his tongue along his teeth. He slowly raised his open hands and backed away. “This isn’t a fight. It’s an order.” He raised a brow at you sharply, “Got it?”

“Whatever,” you turned away from him as Nat came between you and he slowly retreated, the door swinging open harshly as he left you.

“You shouldn’t egg him on like that,” Nat said, leaning against the table. “It’s better to just let him go off.”

“Jesus Christ, you guys treat him like a spoiled child. You’re just going to let him keep on like that?” You grumbled, “I mean, I thought this was a two-way street. All of us gave up our lives for this man so he could save his best friend and what do we get? Treated like fucking scum. We’re supposed to be allies not enemies.” You shook your head, “It’s not like we can go back now. Everything we had is gone.”

“He’ll get over this,” Nat touched your shoulder gently, “He’s not mad at us. He’s mad at the world. At himself.”

“No, he’s  _not_  himself,” you countered pulling away from her, “He’s not the same man he was… he’s too far gone.”

———-

Steve hadn’t been this angry in a long time. True, as of late he was easily riled, irritable even, but his blood was boiling. He tramped through the halls, the grime and blood of his mission still on his dark gear, huffing and puffing. He thought of Y/N staring up at him defiantly. She was barely tall enough to see past his chest and yet she had not wavered. She shouldn’t be so obstinate. She should take his orders and thank him for even allowing her on his team. She was a valuable asset, sure, but it wasn’t like he had no others. Her only talent was that she never knew when to stay down. It was why he had first taken to her, helped her refine her combat technique, vouched for her to Tony.

But he wasn’t Stark’s dog anymore. He was no longer in constant limbo with the man, arguing semantics. He was past those days and they all needed to accept that. _He_  was in charge now and no one, not the government, not Stark, not even his team, could tell him no.

Upon reaching his room, he couldn’t help but slam the door. He shouldn’t care so much, he told himself as he peeled of his gloves. He undid the harness around his shoulders then his belt, he tossed the leather in a pile on the chair. He sat at the edge of the bed and pulled off his boots, growling as he thought of her. The spite that sparkled in her eyes, the challenge which set her jaw. God, he just wanted to hold her down and teach her a lesson. That’s what she really needed, he thought as he pulled his heavy shirt over his head. She needed discipline. To learn to take orders. That pretty little mouth of hers needed to be silenced.

Steve inhaled deeply as he felt himself harden. His thoughts had strayed further than intended. He looked down at his erection as it pushed against the thick fabric of his pants. He was painfully hard. It had been months since he had felt true relief. He could only do so much for himself and with all the stress, sometimes he failed to bring himself to release. He was far too pent up and she had riled him further. The way her chest rose with her frustration, her hands on her hips, her lips pouted in her distress. 

This was her fault, he swore to himself. She needed to atone. He licked his lips as he saw her angry face again. He couldn’t wait to see her crumble.

———-

You were too frustrated to be alone. You had quickly changed and found Sam as he sat in the same spot as the day before. He often wasted his time in front of the television, sinking into the couch as he made a mess of the coffee table. And he could always cheer you up with his lame jokes.

You fell asleep in the chair as your conversation died and the television droned on. You were content with silence and easily lulled into an uncomfortable nap. You were still rattled by the mission and the following interaction with Steve. It made you extremely infuriated and even more dispirited. Seeing him this way, so changed, was unsettling. You had always told him he needed to be more forceful but you’d never meant this. Only that he needed to show some fang when Tony jumped down his throat. 

You awoke with a start as vision of the super soldier’s snarl filled your head. You needed sleep. A good night’s rest and the heat would simmer down. Maybe Steve would apologise. Even if he didn’t, you could at least hash this out like adults.

You stood and stretched, bidding Sam a good night as he fiddled with the remote. He muttered and you left him to fight with the shifty sensor. It was late. You expected to find Sam in the same spot tomorrow morning if not in the gym sweating away the boredom. You stretched as you neared the door. When you touched the handle you were suddenly on edge. The compound was so quiet. Eerie, even. Goosebumps covered your arms as you sensed something off. You couldn’t quite place it. You slowly looked to your feet, a slat of light from beneath the door across your toes. You hadn’t left your light on… _had you?_

You clasped the handle and slow turned it, edging inward as the air grew thicker. Anticipation burned around you, not all your own, and you held back a gasp as you found Steve standing with his back to you, your dresser drawer open as he examined an unseen object. Your blood froze.

He turned slowly, holding up the small metallic vibe with a smirk. “Lonely, are we?” he teased. Your nostrils flared and you raced forward, grabbing for the toy as he held it away from you easily.

“Jesus, Steve, give it to me,” you ordered.

“Why? You gonna use it for me?” he grinned.

“What the fuck is your problem? You have no right to go through my stuff. Or even be in here.”

“Without me you wouldn’t have this room.” He easily held you at bay, his arm bent defensively to block you. “You wouldn’t have this either.” He wiggled the toy in front of you before tossing it over his shoulder and it bounced noisily against the dresser. You stepped back as he lowered his arm and suddenly stepped closer. You didn’t like the look in his eyes. “You best remember who brought you here. Who got you on the team in the first place.”

“Is that what you want? You want me to leave?” You took another step back as he closed in.

He grinned. It was unlike any look you had seen on his face before. “What I want is for you to close that door and apologize.”

“Me apologize?” Your eyes widened. ‘If anything, you’re the one-”

You were interrupted as he lunged forward, pulling you to him and clapping his hand over your mouth. “I am your captain so you’re going to listen to me. Close the door. Now!”

He released you and you stumbled back, steadying yourself as the heat rose along your neck and the air grew harder to breathe. You stared at him, your chest catching as you realized he was serious. You kept your eyes on him as you reached behind yourself blindly, closing the door slowly until it clicked. You gulped and looked at him, wiping your sweaty palms along your jeans.

“Well, I’m waiting’” he urged, watching you as closely as a predator. You had to collect yourself, your eyes searching for an escape. He was faster and stronger.

“I’m sorry?” Your voice cracked with uncertainty. If you said what he wanted to hear he’d leave… _hopefully._ You cleared your throat, “I’m sorry, okay? I should’ve listened to you.”

“You should’ve,” he neared and you pressed yourself against the door. He grabbed your chin, forcing you to look up at him. “So let’s work on your listening skills.” The way his lips curved beneath his dark beard was unsettling. He let go of your chin and snaked his hand around to the back of your neck. He turned around and forced you forward, shoving you to stand just feet away from him. “Turn around and look at me.” He commanded and you hid your shock, quickly obeying.

The intensity of his stare made it difficult to meet his eye line. You tried to stay steady, fighting to keep your composure. “Take your shirt off.” He ordered as of it was a basic military task. You couldn’t help the confusion which creased your forehead and he put his hands on his hips. “I gave you an order.”

He wasn’t kidding. This wasn’t a joke or a show. He really meant it. And he was now blocking the door. You wiped the epiphany from your face and hesitantly reached to the hem of your shirt. His eyes followed the movement, taking in every inch of flesh as it was bared. You swooped your shirt over your head and tossed it at him sharply. “Happy? You’ve proven yourself, okay? I get it, you’re in charge.”

He ignored you and his blue eyes ran the length of your torso, lingering on your bra. “Pants too.” His tongue peeked out, running along his lip. The gesture stoked a heat which added to your shame. This was humiliating not arousing…at least it wasn’t supposed to be.

You blinked and carefully unbuttoned your fly and bunched the waist in the crook of your thumb and index. You pushed the jeans reluctantly down your legs. You couldn’t look at him any longer as the curve of your thighs drew his attention and the cool air touched your skin.

“Ah, look at me.” He warned. You snapped your head up and your eyes burned at him as you untangled your ankles from the denim, your socks lost in the legs. You stood up slowly, hands at your side as you resisted the urge to hide your figure. Your plain white panties and matching bra were your only shield. “The rest, too.” His voice had turned thick, deeper. His blue eyes were as dark as the ocean and his focus on you was unnerving.

You sputtered by no words came out. Your mouth hung open as your eyes held his. He didn’t flinch. You snapped your lips shut and inhaled, stiffly reaching back to unhook your bra. As the metal loops were freed and the fabric loosened, Steve shifted slightly. You brought your hands up and slid the straps down your arms, uncovering your chest, and threw away the bra. Normally, it was a relief, but as your nipples hardened and a shiver ran down your back, you felt so vulnerable. He was intent on you, waiting with bated breath as you fumbled with the elastic of your cotton panties. You gave one last pleading look and he raised single brow, urging you on. He wouldn’t tell you again.

You bit the inside of your cheeks as you tugged down your panties, rolling them until they fell to the floor on their own accord. You searched him for an ounce of relent and his eyes devoured your body. He was moving towards you before you could react. You were backing away clumsily until you were backed up against the dresser. He stopped less than a foot away, staring down at you, his chest rising and falling as he grinned. “Take your hair down,” He growled and you shakily unlooped the hair tie, your hair spilling down. He seemed rather pleased by your swift response.

“On the bed,” He demanded, his tone heeding no refusal. Whatever sick idea he had concocted in the time since your argument, there was no shaking it. You only felt confused as the tickle it stirring deep inside of you. Like you actually wanted this to happen. As if this was perfectly acceptable solution to the fighting and tension between you. You made your way to the bed, doing your best not show too much as you climbed up onto it. “Face me. Now lay back.” You hesitated but did as he said. Before your head was completely reclined, you saw him reached for the disposed toy on the dresser. _What the fuck?!_

“Bend your legs,” Your knees bent easily, almost against your will. “Spread them.” That last order you were having trouble with. He would see everything…and you could guess he meant to do more than see everything. His hands pushed between your clenched legs and he forced them apart. You gasped and he chuckled. “As your captain, I expect you to listen.” He pinched your thigh and you squeaked. “What was that?” He pinched you again, “Did you say ‘yes, Captain’?”

Your lashes fluttered and your lips twitched before you managed to find your voice. “Y-yes, Captain.” You echoed.

“Good,” He praised, his hand spreading across your thigh, kneading the flesh as a click sounded and the sudden buzz of the toy filled the space. Your legs tensed but he kept you from closing them on him, his hand keeping your thigh in place as he grunted in warning. You pressed your lips together as he slowly trailed the head of the small vibe up your leg, drawing circles on your thigh, tracing the outline just along your pussy. Your fingers were buried in the duvet, gripping at it desperately as you tried to resist the building flurry within.

When the vibe touched your folds, you shuddered, cringing as he must have noticed. When it delved deeper, you struggled not to squirm, you were about to tear the duvet. You forced your fingers apart, palming the blanket instead as the muscles of your legs grew taught. As the vibrations met your clit, you barely held in the moan, a muffled whine. He circled your small bundle of nerves and your pelvis bucked.  _Stop!_  You were trying to control yourself but it was all too much, especially as he continued the motion, swirling and swirling until your teeth were clenched and your fingers had curled back into the duvet. You didn’t want to give him the satisfaction and yet you couldn’t hide what he was doing to you.

“Now, show your captain that you can listen,” He dragged the vibrator across your clit, holding it flat so that the ripples built. “Cum.” He turned the vibe suddenly so that its tip was once more focused on your button and the ripples turned to reverberations, running from head to toe as you tilted your pelvis against the toy. “Mmm, good girl.”

As the orgasm passed and the after waves took you, he removed the toy and clicked it off. He left it once more on the dresser, this time shining with your juice. You remained prone on the bed, hiding your face as the embarrassment set in.  _What had he just done? What had you just done?_ You crossed your legs, ready to roll over and wait for him to leave, but he caught your ankles and forced your legs apart. “I didn’t say I was done with you.” His hands slipped down the back of your legs, resting on your thighs as he pushed your knees as high as the would go. He lowered his head, just above the little tuft that edged your pussy, and nuzzled it, almost as if inhaling your scent.  You turned your head away, hand on your forehead as the heat burned along your cheeks.

He delved into you suddenly, his tongue surprising you as it slipped between your folds. He hummed as he played with your clit, the oversensitive bundle buzzing at another go. You bent your legs so that you were almost crushing his hands and he curled your body further, giving himself better access. A long moan escaped your mouth and your hand clamped over your mouth.  _No._

“Go on,” He lifted his head. You looked down at him meekly. He had never made you feel so…inferior. His beard glimmered with your juices, the realization had the flames licking at your skin. “Moan for me.”

He dived back in and you dropped your head back down as he suckled on your clit. It was too much. The sensation was overwhelming; hypnotizing. After months in the compound with nothing but your vibe, the human touch was intoxicating. Your back arched as your nerves lit up and sparked, another orgasm taking you and this time you could not restrain the exclamation. “Oh, god!”

Steve slowly relented, lifting his head as he let go of your thighs. “No, I’m just a Captain,” He taunted, “But I can understand the confusion.”

You were panting, motionless as you grasped at your dwindling wits. In the corner of your vision, he undressed. Your hand was on your chest, trying to steady the ragged beating. You closed your eyes and counted. _Just breathe._ You opened them as the room went silent and you found Steve at the edge of the bed, his cock in hand as he slowly and deliberately stroked himself. His blue eyes ran the length of your figure and his tongue once more flicked across his lips. He was big. Like bigger than any you had seen before. And so thick. Your eyes widened as you watched him play with his himself, resting one knee on the bed as he prepared to climb up.

“Don’t worry,” He grinned, “I’ll take it easy on you for this exercise.”

You were up on your elbows again, trying to crawl backwards as your feet kicked at the mattress. You couldn’t take all of that. Well, your pussy would say otherwise as it throbbed painfully, bemoaning an emptiness you had been ignoring for far too long. Steve’s second knee came up and he caught your ankles again, dragging you close and moving his grip to your hips. He removed a hand to position himself, reaching down to run his cock along your clit to your entrance, rubbing it back and forth as he slicked the head. You bit your lip, another moan betraying you.

He lined his cock up to your entrance, pushing just the head inside, stretching you in a mixture of delight and discomfort. You inhaled, bracing yourself for the rest of him, his eyes shining at the colour in your face. As he went further, your fingers closed around the wrist of his hand which held you down at the hip. Your nails dug into his flesh as he forced his way in, your walls resisting at first only to accommodate him as they longed for more. You squeaked as he impaled you fully, your entire body numb except for your pussy which pulsed around him.

 “I’d say it’s been too long,” He rolled his hips, testing your limits. “Fuck, you’re tight.” He pulled back, pausing as only his tip remained inside of you. You blinked and looked down at his cock, wondering if he would just leave it at that. Maybe his game was over. He slammed back into you suddenly and you flung your head back, eyes rolling as you cried out. He purred in approval and thrust again, again, again. Every time your body contorted in response and both hands held you by your hips, guiding himself into you harshly, using your body easily, as if you weighed nothing. The sound of his flesh against yours filled the room and betrayed how wet you were.

He released your hips, grabbing your wrist as you grasped at the duvet and pinned them above your head, leaning over you as he continued to fuck you. Somehow, his motion only grew harder, deeper, faster. Your legs were limp, no resistance left in your muscles as he pounded into you. He put all his weight into each thrust as if he was punishing you. You were too far gone to feel the pain, your moans turning to gibbering as your head lolled around wildly. You were cumming again and you muttered some nonsense; maybe it was his name, maybe it was “Captain”. You didn’t know as orgasm after orgasm robbed you of your sense.

Your wrists were suddenly loose as Steve pulled out of you sharply, cupping his balls as he stroked himself to climax, his cum spurting out along your pelvis and seeping down towards your pussy. You were too weak to move, your fatigue returning as the adrenaline and ecstasy faded away. Steve gave a satisfied sigh as he looked over you splayed out like a rag doll.

He rounded the bed, bending so that he was looking down at you. He bundled your hair in his hand and forced your head straight. “So, the next time I give you an order, what do you say?” He asked.

“Y-yes, Captain,” You babbled and he chuckled.

“Very good,” He let your head fall back and stood, your eyes closing on their own accord. The haze clouded your vision and you saw only the distant blur as Steve moved around your chamber and dressed. The open and close of your door confirmed his departure and finally, you drifted off, images of the angry super soldier forming in a much different light.


	2. Pulling Rank

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Stuck in the compound, the reader can’t get away from the captain.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I decided to do a sequel (at least) to this fic. Hopefully you all enjoy some more dark Steve although lately it seems he’s taking over the blog. I’m still working on raffle winners but they will be up over the next few weeks and hopefully offer more variety. 
> 
> Anyways, thanks for reading. Feel free to comment with your thoughts :)

Waking up the next day was difficult. Every muscle in your body was both tight and weak. You felt as if you had been run over. You were in the same position Steve had left you in; sprawled sideways across the bed, the remnants of his dry cum on the duvet and your skin. You shook as you sat up, bruises darkened along your hip bones where he had held you down. You glanced over at the vibe carelessly laying on the dresser and your stomach flipped. It had definitely been real.

You rose, wobbling on your legs before you caught yourself on the dresser. You grabbed the toy and lumbered into the bathroom, dropping it into the bin. You doubted you’d have any urges after last night. You’d be content enough to be left alone. If Steve wanted to chase you out, he was doing a good job. You sat on the toilet, your back aching as you hung your head. You should go back to Stark Tower and beg mercy; swallow your pride and sign the Accords. _No, it was too late for that_. You had chosen your dog in this fight but you hadn’t realized it was vicious.

It took about ten minutes to find your strength again. You managed to turn on the shower and step inside, hoping to sear away Steve’s touch. He lingered on you even after you stepped out of the steaming bathroom. In this place, there was no escaping him. You felt worse as memories of the night before had your skin burning. It was everything you had been yearning for and more; you just hadn’t expected it to happen like that.

You stripped the bed and tossed the blankets in a pile. You’d worry about the laundry later. You were restless. You kept pacing, unable to sit still for more than minute. _What if he came back?_ A fucking lock wouldn’t hold off a super soldier. You should go. Just leave. He didn’t want you on missions anymore and it seemed he didn’t want you in the compound either. You could ask Clint for help. He was laying low, having gone along with everything for the sake of his family, but he’d give you place to hide out. No one else needed to know.

_No, that was selfish. Risky._ You couldn’t endanger his family for your own missteps.

A knock came and you froze. You stared at the door, shaking as your visitor rapped again. The handle slowly turned and you waited with dread. As the door opened you gasped and sighed in relief. It was only Nat. You shook your head at yourself.

“Hey, what’s going on?” She let the door go, “I thought we were going to work out this morning. Why didn’t you answer your door?”

“Uh, sorry, I’m tired,” You lied, “I...was just stressing all night about…” Your voice trailed off and your eyes searched for anything but visions of Steve. “My suspension. I don’t know, um, don’t know if I, uh, should stay any longer.”

“Y/N, it was one day. A stupid argument. You can’t go.” She scoffed, “Don’t leave me here alone with these idiots. I mean, Wanda’s never here and I don’t wanna be the only one left with brains above the waist.”

You tilted your head and chewed your lip. You couldn’t tell her, she wouldn’t believe you. You didn’t _want_ to tell her. Or anyone. You wanted to forget. If you kept in line, listened, Steve would leave you alone. You hoped. “Fine,” You relented, “Not like I have anywhere to go. Let’s just…” You paused as you turned to the dresser, your hand hovering in front of the knob. He had stood right here; he’d been waiting. “...Go work out.”

“You could use it. Get some of that tension out,” Nat chided, “Jesus, Y/N, you’re gonna start driving me crazy along with yourself.”

“The guys, they usually work out at night, don’t they?” You grabbed some workout gear and headed into the washroom, leaving the door slightly open so Nat could hear you.

“Don’t worry about Steve. If anything, he’ll just give you the silent treatment. He’s stubborn but he’ll get over it.” She said, “You know, you were right. He was being a dick.”

“Uh, yeah,” You pulled on your shorts and the loose tee. You re-entered the bedroom and sat to put on socks and your sneakers. “I just, I don’t need another argument, is all. I just want to work out and forget about everything.”

“Oh yeah, even the laundry?” She kicked the pile of sheets.

“It’s my day for the wash,” You lied, Sam wouldn’t mind you snagging the machines. He rarely used them anyhow. “Trying to get a head start.”

“Well, let’s go.” She clapped her hands, “I really do get fed up waiting on you all the time.”

“You could’ve gone without me,” You grabbed your water bottle; you could fill it from the fountain in the gym. “You’ve done it before.”

“You’re a drag when you’re hungover,” She chuckled and led you into the hallway. “Well, more so than usual.”

You and Nat continued to kid until you came in sight the glass wall of the gym. It was like an actual facility; machines, weights, mats, everything you needed. You laughed as you turned the corner, almost forgetting what had you so on edge. Until you glanced over at the gym. You stopped short and Nat nearly tripped in her surprise.

“What is it?” She asked.

“I…” You stared through the transparent wall. Steve had his back to you as he squatted a good two hundred pounds and Sam jogged on the treadmill across from him. “What are they doing here so early?”

“Oh,” She turned, noticing the unexpected patrons, “It’s fine. I’m sure we can all share peaceably.”

“No,” You backed away, “No, I think I’d rather do my laundry.”

“Fuck, Y/N, it’ll be fine.” She hissed.

“You can work out without me, I’ll just go later tonight,” You tried to get away before Steve could turn and see you. “Really, I just...I can’t deal with him right now, okay?”

She sighed and crossed her arms. “Fine. Have fun with your dirty sheets.” She spun on her heel and marched away. You shook your head as you watched Steve’s back muscles move through the thin fabric of his shirt. Your lip trembled as you recalled his strength, how easily he had held you down, the deep plunge of his cock inside of you. You turned and hurried in the other direction, your head spinning.

* * *

Fresh sheets on the bed, a sandwich smuggled back to your room for supper, a day spent successfully evading Steve. Another hour and you would chance the gym. Midnight workouts weren’t very popular. You spent the time watching Youtube on your phone, your leg shaking eagerly. You hated missing a workout; especially as it was essential to your livelihood. Although, you weren’t going on missions anytime soon.

You checked your watch; quarter after. You slipped into your sneakers and grabbed your water bottle again, this time determined to get your sweat on. You were relieved to find the gym empty and you started your stretches just in front of the bike. You liked to cycle; your speed your greatest asset. As you touched your toes, you heard the subtle whisper of the gym door. You looked between your legs and nearly fell on your head. Steve stopped just inside, crossing his arms as he stared at your ass.

“I was wondering where you were this morning,” He watched as you stood straight, turning to him in surprise. “Nat said you weren’t feeling up to it today.” He neared, “Wonder why?”

“What do you want?” You walked backwards, colliding painfully with the treadmill.

“What was that? I didn’t hear a sir or Captain in there.” He tilted his head as he spoke, “I thought we went over this last night.” You were trembling, reaching back to grip the machine as you fought to stay standing. “It’s gonna be a long suspension if you keep on like this.”

You felt behind you, edging away from the treadmill, past the bike and around the weights. There was a rack between you and him. He followed steadily; enough that he kept up. When you were closest to the door, you turned and darted, pulling it open as your panic turned your vision hazy. You could hear him behind you as you ran down the halls. You knew he was faster than you but you didn’t care. You needed to get away. You turned the next corner and he caught you by the back of your shirt, the fabric tearing down the middle. The force of it caused you to trip and you barely got your arms up to save your head.

Out of breath, you tried to get your knees under you but a kick to your rear kept you down. Steve slid his foot under your side and flipped you over as you panted. He brought a foot to the other side of you and knelt down to look at you closer. He smirked. “You didn’t think our little lessons were done.” He taunted, “You still have much to learn.”

“No, please, you don’t have to do this,” You attempts to push him off were futile and he caught your wrists and backed up and pulling you to your feet. You struggled with him but it was hopeless. “I’ll scream.” You threatened.

“Go ahead. Who do you think would believe you? Even if they stumbled on this little scene, what are they going to do?” He chortled, “I mean really, what have you done about it? What _can_ you do?”

“Why?” You breathed desperately.

“Because I can,” He said, “Because I can’t be leashed anymore. Those days are over and I’m in charge now.”

“You made your fucking point,” You hissed, his grip was painful on your wrists.

“I know,” He look down at you triumphantly, “It’s not about that anymore.” He spun you around, releasing you and holding you to the wall by your neck. He leaned down, his voice low as he spoke in your ear. “You know, there is a side effect of the serum not many know about. Torturous, really. It’s this unending desire. This deep want that just can’t be sated. You get one taste and you wanted more. A hunger that only grows the more you feed it.” He exhaled, his breath singing your cheek, “I’ve ignored it for too long.”

“Steve, please,” Your eyes were wet, “Please, I know this isn’t you. I’m just...that girl you met in New York. You trained me, taught me everything I know.”

“I didn’t train you well enough,” He snarled as he bent closer, his lips brushing your neck before his teeth sunk in. You yelped as he bit you and his hand moved over your mouth as he sucked at your flesh. He pulled away with a pop, standing straight to admire his mark. He brought his other hand up and ran his thumb over the tender spot. “I’ve decided on two months suspension. I figure it’s enough time for you to go over the basics.”

“What’s changed in you, Steve Rogers?” You sputtered.

“Nothing. I was always an animal,” His fingers framed your face; an unspoken threat. He could crush your head in a single move. “I’ve just been uncaged.” 

You croaked. There were no words left to you. Your voice was caught in your chest, your whole body trembling at you stared up at this monster before you. 

“I always thought of fucking you, but I was too cheesy about it. I thought of dates and flowers.” He scoffed to himself. “ What a joke.”

You squirmed but it made no difference on his hold on you. He smiled at your pathetic struggles and he reached down to yank on the front of your top, the torn fabric slipping down your arms. You caught it but it was useless now. A rag. “I will give you one choice; should I fuck you here or drag you back to mine?”

You blinked, your chin shaking as you held back the lump rising in your throat. “Not here,” You said quietly, “Please...Captain.”

“Ah ha,” He sounded impressed with your use of his rank. “Good girl. Come on then. I can’t wait any longer.”

He turned you, keeping you ahead of him as he marched you down the hallways, your arms holding the remnants of your shirt against your chest. His room was just around the corner from yours. A fact which now disturbed you. You watched longingly as you passed your own door and he stopped you before his. 

“Now,” His long lashes flicked as he looked you up and down. “We’re going to practice your listening skills tonight. See what you really learned. So, you do what I say, you do it well, and you’re halfway to a model soldier. Got it?”

“Yes, sir,” You nodded, staring at his door with dread.

“Hmm,” He grumbled, “I think I prefer Captain.”

“Yes, Captain,” You kept your eyes forward, doing your best to still your nerves. Reaching desperately for some semblance of stability. Do as he said and it’d be over soon.

“Open the door,” He said and you quickly reached for the handle, pushing it inward. “Ladies first,” He beckoned you onward and you stepped inside, “Yeah, mmm, you’ve got such a cute little ass.” The door closed behind him. “Stop right there. Bend over.” He groaned in approval and neared you, his hands settling on the thin fabric of your leggings. He jiggled your ass before slapping it as hard as he could. You caught yourself before you could land on your head.

“Stand up,” He backed away, “At attention.” He commanded and you stood straight, your shirt falling to the floor. “This,” He reached out and snapped the strap of your sports bra, “You need to get a nicer uniform, soldier.”

“Yes, Captain,” Your voice was airy; barely your own. It was his now, as your body was.

“Undress, quick,” He circled you, silent as you took of each piece of clothing. The tension was suffocating. “We’ll have to work on that time, soldier.” Your lips curled as he once more addressed you with the patronizing title. “Good form, nonetheless.” He cupped your breast, flicking your nipple with his thumb. “Now, undress me.”

You gritted your teeth through another ‘Yes, Captain’, and moved closer to him. He stood before you patiently, watching you with a smirk was you tugged up the hem of his tee shirt. He lifted his arms, stooping to help you maneuver the cotton over his head. You struggled so much to unbuckle his belt that he laughed. When at last that was done, you slid off his jeans, pausing to remove his shoes and socks awkwardly. You felt as low as dirt.

You glanced up at him as all that was left were his boxer brief. He looked down at himself, his erection about to burst through on its own accord. You pressed your fingertips to the elastic, slowly slipping them under and guiding them down. As the head of his cock popped out, your eyes widened. It somehow looked bigger than last time. _Well, you had been half-delirious then._ Lower, lower, until they fell to the floor. He stepped out of the underwear, his cock poking your stomach as he came closer. You back up but the flash in his eyes kept you near.

“Now, before we continue, I need you to answer a few questions. Honesty is important in a good soldier,” He walked around you again, his cock bobbing with each step. “How many men have you fucked? Before me, of course.”

You sighed and looked down. Whether the number was high or low, it was embarrassing. You answered and he nodded, stopping before you. “And,” He took your hand and wrapped it around the base of his cock. “Were any as big as me?”

“No, Captain,” You admitted. He was well above average and there were few who could compare.

“Mm-mm-mm,” He preened at your answer, “I could tell. That tight little pussy needs breaking in.” You let go of him and he sneered. You quickly set your hand back on his cock. “But you’re biggest problem is that mouth of yours, so why don’t we work on that?” You swallowed and looked down at his cock, your fingers couldn’t even wrap around it fully. You couldn’t imagine taking all of it.

You kept hold of him and stiffly got to your knees. You looked up at him. He was too tall. “Damn,” He swore, “All is not lost. Bed. Hands and knees.” You let go of him and did as he said, climbing up on his large bed; bigger than your double. You waited at the edge as he followed, standing before you as he wiggled his hips teasingly. “Better.” You stared up at him, hoping he would suddenly change his mind. _No, that was stupid_. “Suck my cock.”

You cringed, letting out a deep breath. “Yes, Captain,” You bent to press your lips to his tip, flicking your tongue out to wet it. You did your best to spread your saliva up and down his shaft with your lips and tongue. You prayed he didn’t try to go all the way. You’d choke if he tried that. You carefully stretched your mouth around his head and he twitched, a moan floating from him. He leaned into you, pushing further in as you opened your jaw as far as you could. You flinched as his head poked the back of your throat, drool plastered on your lips.

You tried to pull back but he caught the back of your head. He forced himself deeper and you kicked your feet as you struggled to breath. You could barely get enough air through your nose. You were almost at his base, tears at the corner of your eyes as your nails dug into the blankets. He reached his limit and your passage was completely blocked. He stayed there for a moment, watching your face change colour before pulling back. He thrust in again and out; a steady pace as you gasped between intrusions. Your sweat mixed with tears and saliva as he moved his hips faster, fucking your face as his hands held your shoulders.

“That’s it, soldier,” He hummed, “Fuck, I didn’t think you could take it all but look at you.”

You grew dizzier with each plunge into your throat and your body began to sag, hands slipping as you crumpled on the mattress. He removed his cock from your mouth and let you fall, watching you wheeze into the duvet. He sat down beside you, feet still on the floor as he reached over and patted your back. “Catch your breath. That’s it.” He cooed, “Now, get on my cock. You can’t just leave me this way.”

Weakly, you lifted your head and sat up, dragging yourself to the edge of the bed. You climbed down and turned to him as he leaned back with his hands on the mattress behind him. “Soldier.” He warned.

“Yes, Captain,” You quavered, stepping closer. You got up, squatting over his thick thighs as you reached down to steady his wet cock. You were shaking as you used his muscular torso to hold yourself up, his head at your entrance. You let yourself slip onto him, a sigh fluttered from him as you lowered yourself. There was some resistance, some pain, but you pressed on, afraid he would force himself in all at once. Your walls were tight around him, gripping him as he impaled you fully. “Aiii!” You let out the unwanted yipe at the overwhelming fullness.

“I think you know the drill, soldier,” He stayed reclined, watching as you lifted yourself on your knees and brought yourself back down. You shuddered atop him. “You like that cock?” He asked as you continued your motion, fingers clawing at your own thighs. “Answer me, soldier.”

“Yes, Captain,” The reply rose on its own as you drowned in ecstasy. He was too much. Too strong, to powerful, too big.

“Tell me you like it,” He breathed, tilting his pelvis up slightly, getting even deeper.

“I like your cock, Captain,” Your head lolled back as you rode him.

“Touch yourself,” He rasped, “I want to see you cum.” You moved your hand to your clit, keeping stride, and began to rub yourself, eager for your climax. Your arms shook and your muscles clenched and released as you chased the high. “Are you going to cum for your Captain?”

“Yes, yes, Captain,” You forced out in your throes, “I’m going to-to-to cum, Ca-a-a-a-ptain.” Your orgasm was stunning. Dumbfounding as every thought left your head. You forgot that it was Steve below you, that he had dragged you here, that he had fucked you just as roughly the night before; everything.

“Ugh,” He grunted, his hands on your hips as he sat up. He stood up easily with you still on his cock, bouncing you up and down. All at once he lifted you from his length and set you on your weak legs, nudging your shoulder. “On your knees, soldier.”

His cock twitched as you lowered yourself, still dripping with your juices. “Take my cum in your mouth.” He ordered with hands on his hips.

You grabbed his cock and began to stroke him. “Faster.” He groaned, “Yeah, yeah, more. Tighter.” He commanded your every move and you worked his length furiously. “Open your mouth.” You forced your lips open and tilted your head back, his cum spurting forth. You tried to catch it as best you could, hot ribbons landing along your cheeks and across your lips, your tongue coated in saltiness.

You slowed as his orgasm faded and released him as you sat back on your heels. As his cum cooled on your face, your cheeks burned. There it was; the humiliation. Steve reached downand smeared his cum across your face before grabbing your chin firmly as he forced you to look at him. 

“Now, it’s time to test your stamina, soldier.” You had no choice but to stand as he pulled you up by your jaw, “Touch your toes.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> See you below in the comments and possibly in another part. <3


	3. Misconduct

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steve takes the team on a mission but returns with a vengeance.
> 
> This chapter: masturbation and rough sex

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so here’s another follow up to this one. Hope you all enjoy some Scary Steve! He gets a bit terrifying in this one but I had fun writing him at least.
> 
> Anyhow, thanks for reading. Feel free to share your thoughts in the comments :)

You were relieved when Steve took the team on their next mission. It was only days after he had dragged you back to his room and since, you had been certain that he would barge in on you at any moment. In any place. You realized, through pointed stares and subtle grins, that he was toying with you. If he didn’t relish so much in your discomfort, he’d likely have acted on his obvious urges. He had taken to finding you in the most chance of instances; in the kitchen or the lounge, watching you through the clear glass wall of the gym. He always turned away when others could notice him. He was sly.

And so your goodbye with Nat was bittersweet. You hated to see her go but were relieved for Steve’s absence. This mission would see everyone away from the compound but you. You weren’t sure if the solitary break would ease your nerves or drive you mad. You watched the jet depart over the horizon and exhaled the breath you had been holding in dread. It was as if a pressure had been lifted from your chest.  _He_  was gone.

It took fifteen minutes of disbelief to settle down. Then you wandered the halls until you came upon the gym. It had been a while since your last fulfilling workout. You hurried to your room and changed, returning and taking your time in your reps on each machine. You were more relaxed as you finished your cool down stretches and dragged your feet back to your room. You flopped on your bed, your phone right beside you on the mattress as you closed your eyes. It had been so long since you felt like you.

You flipped on your television as you lazed across the bed and lost yourself in the drone of dialogue. You weren’t really paying attention but the white noise it provided calmed you further. It must have been hours spent doing nothing but staring at the screen before you returned to reality. Your phone buzzed as if to call you back to earth. Your eyes snapped open and you turned to stare at the small device. It was likely Nat telling you that they had reached the safe house, or maybe that they were on their way to the drop point. Whatever it was, any news was better than no news.

The small vibration continued to rumble your bed. You huffed and reached over clumsily to retrieve the phone. You lifted the screen to find it filled with notifications. None of them were Nat. Steve’s name blinked at you and you scrolled down. ‘Hey’; ‘Answer me’ ; ‘Y/N’ ; ‘Answer me now, soldier’. The last message had you sitting up straight. Your hand shook as you unlocked the phone and your thumb hovered over the text box. _What could you say?_

‘What?’ You typed tersely. You cringed the second you hit send.  _That wasn’t right._

‘One more chance to get it right, soldier,’ Steve replied and you gripped the phone, wanting to smash it on the night table.

‘Yes, Captain,’ You keyed in the message with derision, happy he could not see the scowl on your face. You waited for his response. As the minutes ticked by, you thought perhaps he was done. Merely playing with you from afar.

‘Top drawer. White box.’ The bubble blipped up and you slowly glanced over at your dresser. The phone shook again. ‘New uniform. I wanna see it on, soldier.’

You didn’t move, lowering the phone as you stared at the television. Even so far away, he had a hold over you. You could ignore him but knowing he would return and your plight made all the worse by such inaction, you looked to the screen again. Another vibration tickled your palm. ‘Five minutes, soldier. If I have to tell you again, your next exercise won’t be so easy.’

‘Yes, Captain,’ you repeated and set down your phone. So much for alone time.

Your life had come to be a maelstrom of uneasiness and Steve’s shadow loomed even as he was miles away. You sighed and pushed yourself from bed, crossing to your dresser wearily. You shifted the top drawer open and a white box sat atop the rest of your underwear and bra. It hadn’t been there that morning. Steve must have slipped in before his final briefing. The thought of him unknowingly coming and going from your room was chilling.

You took the box and set it on the top of the dresser. You shakily opened the lid, almost dropping it back in place as you saw its contents. A black lace bodysuit which couldn’t possibly offer an ounce of modesty. You shook your head and grabbed your phone, your thumbs working furiously; ‘you can’t be serious.’

Then your phone began to chime. You stared as Steve’s name stood bold against the call screen and you swore, dragging your finger to answer. “You best get your uniform on, soldier.” Steve’s harsh command rose from the speaker. ‘Two minutes left.’

You hissed and placed the phone on the dresser beside the box, almost slamming it there. You tore your shirt over your head with a grumble. “I expect a response, soldier.’ The speaker barked.

“Yes, Captain,” You fought to keep the derision from your tone.

You removed your leggings next, making silent and quick work of your clothes. You sat on the edge of the bed to slip your feet through the leg holes, standing as you shimmied into the lace. You reached back to secure the hooks, the cups uncomfortable against your chest. The bottom was much too high cut, offering little cover to ass or thighs. 

“Ugh,” You huffed unthinkingly.

“What was that?” Steve intoned dangerously.

“I said I’m done,” You lied.

“With five seconds to spare, soldier,” Your phone clicked as the call ended and messenger began to sing instead. You reluctantly took the phone and answered the video call. Steve appeared, shoulders bare, hair slightly askew, his eyes dangerous. “Well, let me see.”

You chewed your lip before a quiet ‘yes, Captain’ slipped out and you carried the phone to the tv stand, shutting off the bigger screen as you rested the smaller one upright against it. You backed away carefully, coming into full view of the camera. You tried not to look at him. He was much easier to avoid on a six-inch screen.

“Mmm,” He hummed in approval, “Now, when I get back, I’d say maybe three days, I want you in uniform. Just like this soldier.” He inhaled heavily and you could hear the predatory bristle in his breath. “Zero-hundred hours, my quarters. Understood?”

You crossed your arms, looking away as you nodded and muttered just loud enough for the mic. “Yes, Captain.”

“I expect you to stand at alert. Arms at the side, shoulders straight, eyes forward.” You stiffly fixed your posture and swallowed your irritation. “Better,” He praised. “It’s too bad you got yourself suspended. I could use a soldier like you on missions…” His blue eyes were smoky even through the screen was at a distance. “Even officers need their r and r.”

You lowered your lashes, embarrassed at his comments.  _When had you become just an object to him? You had once been colleagues; peers; you daresay, friends._  All this over a dumb argument. Well, it was more than that. He had changed since you had come to the compound. A kicked dog nipping at all who got close enough. You had merely been the unfortunate victim trapped in his maw.

You heard the shutter of a screenshot being taken and were drawn back to the present. “What are you doing?” You hissed.

“It’s going to be a long three days,” He smirked. “I’m already rock hard, soldier.” You blinked, staring at the phone as you neared and lifted it from the stand. “Unfortunately I do have an early morning,” He continued casually, “And with this team, I can’t see this mission going smoothly.” He raised a cynical brow, “I’ll see you when I get back. Full inspection.”

The call ended at that and you frowned at the phone, slowly setting it flat beside the television. You were tired but you saw little sleep ahead of you. Before anything, you had to get out of this awful body suit. That at least would help you breathe.

***

It was only two days. You hadn’t managed to relax since the phone call and Steve’s impending return had you even more anxious than his presence. Anticipation was often worse than endurance. You were in the kitchen when you heard the jet on the pad atop the building. You were tempted to dump the chopped veggies and hide in your room without dinner but you knew there was no avoiding him. Besides, he had already taken so much from you. You weren’t going to let him take everything. You continued to dice the peppers, pulling a few more from the fridge. The team would likely be hungry and you couldn’t punish them for their leader’s proclivities.

Sam was the first to stomp in, his loud voice entering before him. “Mmm, what is that smell?” He boomed from the hall as you sizzled the onion in a pan. “Anything’s better than those ration packs.” He marched in, dragging his wings by the strap as he placed them heavily against the counter. “I see you’ve been enjoying your alone time.”

“Yeah, I…” Steve entered just behind Sam, crossing his arms as his eyes found you over his teammate’s shoulder. He leaned against the wall, watching you. His face showed little more than his usual stoniness. You turned and dumped the peppers from the cutting board into the pan, “I heard you guys arrive so I, um, added more.”

“You know a man well,” Sam joked and you heard more voices. Nat and Wanda were laughing as they appeared and greeted you warmly.

“Need help?” Wanda asked in her stoic accent.

“If you want,” You shrugged, continuing your work, “You did just get back. You guys are welcome to just chill.”

“Yeah, I mean, I doubt she’s expended her energy much in our absence,” Steve’s deep timbre cut through, “Barely more useful here than in the field.”

“Steve!” Nat hissed as she turned on him, “What the fuck?”

You saw the twitch in his jaw as he measured her before him. His blue eyes flicked to you for a second. _Fuck, that did not bode well._  He raised his brow sharply, “We’re a small team. Efficiency over numbers.” He growled, “I wouldn’t be much of a captain if I sugar-coated everything.”

“Not much of one when your such an asshole,” Nat snapped, “For fuck’s sake, give her a break. All you do is bitch.”

“All I do is watch your ass,” He retorted, pushing himself from the wall, “And hers,” He gestured at you, “And hers, and his.” He pointed to Wanda and Sam in turn. “And all I ask is that you fucking listen. And pay me the respect I’m due.” His hands were on his hips, making his shoulders look even bigger, “But here you are, mouthing off. And all for  _her_? Who can’t take a single fucking order!”

“Let it go, Steve,” Sam chimed in “What was it? A week ago? Jesus.”

“She’s lucky she’s still here,” Steve snarled as he looked around at his team, “All of you are. This isn’t Tony’s parade, it’s mine. My team, my rules. You knew that when you joined up.”

You shook your head, a quiet sigh as you added the chunks of chicken to the vegetable medley. You turned back to grab some seasoning, sensing the heat of Steve’s glare. You looked up as he faced tensed at the sight of your silent defiance. He stepped forward, Sam’s hand on his chest keeping him from coming closer. “Cool down, man.”

“You got something to say, soldier?” He barked and you froze. You reeled as if slapped at the use of the title. “I see you over there rolling your eyes, so you got something to say, go on.”

You weren’t sure how this had all turned on you. You hadn’t said anything. You had done your best not to. “I…” You glanced around, Wanda and Nat looked terrified. “Nothing, Captain.”

“No, no, I can see it,” He pushed against Sam who strained to hold him back. “Go on and say whatever’s bouncing around in that simple head of yours.”

This was the last thing you had expected. Your plan had been to appease him; keep him as happy as he could be and be done with it. Yet, passivity had never been your strong suit and with a super soldier rearing at you, you had to bite back. “ _This_  isn’t what we signed up for,” You uttered grimly, “You’re not the man you were.”

“Let me go!” Steve tried to shove Sam away and Nat and Wanda grabbed his arms, the three of the barely able to keep him away from you. “I’ll show you who’s Captain, soldier.”

“She didn’t do anything, Steve,” Nat grunted, “Leave her alone!”

They struggled a little longer as you pressed yourself against the counter and finally Steve relented. He backed off and shook away the other three, pushing  Sam sharply. “Bunch of ingrates.” He growled, “All of you.” His chest rose and fell as he slowly retreated to the door, cracking his knuckles. “Post-mission briefing in one hour. If you’re late, you can join Y/N during our next mission.”

With that, Steve swept through the door and left the rest of you stunned. He had been temperamental lately but he hadn’t been so openly volatile. Your heart was pounding as you stared the door frame. You had been certain he was about to strip you down in front of everyone. Or worse. You gulped and slowly turned back to the stove, stirring the contents of the pan with a spatula. Your hand was shaking.

“Y/N, are you okay?” Nat asked quietly as she neared.

“Please,” You sniffed, “You guys shouldn’t have done that.”

“Defend you?” Sam scoffed. “We’re a team.”

“No, we’re not,” You breathed, “Not to him.”

“Y/N,” Wanda was at your elbow, her hand gently touched your shoulder. You looked up at her and her eyes searched yours. Her lips parted as if she could see right through you. “Did…” Her voice died and she looked around suddenly, as if recalling the others, “We only want to help.”

“Let him be mad,” You muttered glumly, “He’ll get over it,” You turned away evasively, “Really, we’ve all seen his moods. We should just–you guys, just let me finish dinner, please.”

You could sense them looking at each other but they didn’t say anything further as you ignored them for the stove top. You waited for them to leave, their footsteps hesitantly passing into the dining room. You stepped back from the oven and shook your head. _Shit._

***

When you finally returned to your room, the team was in their briefing. You had your television going but couldn’t focus on anything but Steve’s presence. He was there, in the compound, and he was pissed. You were trying to dissociate when your phone buzzed on the night table. You looked over and your chest felt heavy. You bit the inside of your lip and reached over.

‘Zero hundred hours. My room. Don’t forget your uniform, soldier.’ Steve’s text was decisive. An order you couldn’t ignore especially after the episode in the kitchen. You checked the time. One hour. The briefing must have gone late. It was a couple minutes before you could move, a few more to dig up the body suit, longer to put it on. You hid it beneath a hoodie and some loose sweats, combing out your hair as you pulled on a pair of slip-on shoes. After a moment in crisis, you had ten minutes left. Enough to finish up your panic attack and get to Steve’s room.

You crept down the hall. The compound was quiet. The others had likely slunk back to their rooms after a lecture from their valiant leader. There was worse in store for you. It wasn’t far, a couple doors away. You stood before Steve’s room and stared.  _Just knock_. You couldn’t stand there all night. You stiffly raised your hand, trembling, but you couldn’t do it.

The door opened anyway and you were caught in the cross hairs like a rabbit. Steve tilted his head as he stared down at you, gripping the door as he looked you over. “You’re late,” He greeted starkly, “I said zero hundred exactly.” You sputtered at him, unable to summon an excuse, and he grabbed your upper arm, nearly pulling you off your feet as he dragged you inside. The door shut with a thunderous click.

He released you and you nearly tripped over yourself. “Attention,” He called and you stood straight. “Uniform?” He asked as he rounded you, his eyes scouring your lazy attire.

“Captain,” You hastily unzipped your hoodie and revealed the bodice of the bodysuit. He nodded and watched patiently as you undressed; your clothes folded a top your shoes as you tucked them aside beside the door. You returned to your stance, shoulders straight and eyes forward.

“Mmm,” He walked another circle around you. You noticed how his hand balled into a tight fist. “Looks even better in person,” He came up behind you, his warmth searing your back, “Earlier, in the kitchen; not good.” His voice was dangerous, “You don’t know how close I was…” He inhaled deeply, pressing against you, “I could’ve had you bent over right there, soldier. Do you think they could really stop me?  Hmm? I  _let_ them stop me.”

You stayed silent, swallowing your fear. His tone sent a trickle of ice down your spine. “Tell me, how have I changed?” He leaned down, his voice gravelly in your ear.

You kept yourself from wavering as your legs threatened to buckle. “I…you…are different. Rougher,” His hand tickled the bottom of your ass, “Angrier,” His other snaked up, fingertips dancing along your throat, “Darker.”

“Heh,” He scoffed, his fingers stretching across your neck, “I think maybe you just have a problem with authority.” He sneered, “A good soldier knows their place. Holds their tongue.” He rescinded his hand and stepped away, smacking your ass hard enough that you stumbled forward. “You still lack discipline.” You could hear his belt buckle as he undid it. “Bend over. Touch your toes, back straight.” You did as he said, cringing as you gave him a full view of your ass, barely concealed in the bodysuit’s thong. “Hold just like that.”

It was a standard stretch but holding the position not so much. The first minute was easier, even the second was little strain. But then your muscles began to strain and the urge to look back as you heard his movement and the rustle of his clothing combined to make you restless. Your thighs began to burn, and your arms a little, your lower back adding to your discomfort.

“Good form, soldier,” His hand surprised you as he touched the small of your back, “Should we do another five minutes?” You clenched your jaw as he kneaded your ass. “I would but…we have a long night. I don’t want you to spend yourself in the first hour.” His hands squeezed your ass and he backed away again. “Stand straight, soldier.”

You righted yourself, the blood rushing from your head where it had gathered. You were almost dizzy for the sudden shift. Steve came up in front of you; naked. With each step, his thick cock bobbed and you kept your eyes on his face. 

“You know what,” He neared, grabbing the lace between your cleavage, “I prefer you without a uniform.” He rent the bodysuit down the middle, tearing straight between the cups and down the stomach. The fabric went loose around you, slipping down your legs as he tugged it past your thighs and let go. “You know, your suspension doesn’t have to be all bad,” He grabbed your chin between his thumb and index finger, “If you just followed orders, you could make everyone happy.”

“Yes, Captain,” You said in resignation, staring up at him dully. You just wanted him to be done with it. You hated his little taunts and jabs. It made it all more unbearable.

He removed his hand from your chin and turned, dragging the armchair so that it was right before you. He gestured you to sit and you obeyed without argument. Once sat, he pushed your knees apart as far as they could go. He stood straight, backing up as his eyes swept over you coolly. 

“We’ll start easy,” His cock twitched, “Touch yourself.”

Your face dropped. You blinked at him dumbly but his silence and the fiery look on his face assured you that you hadn’t misheard him. He waited, expectantly, but you knew he had little patience. You reluctantly brought your hand forward and slipped it down your thigh, inching towards your pussy. You had to look away as your fingers grazed your folds, dipping between your folds.

You dragged two fingers up to your clit, spreading the slickness which had started to pool there. You were embarrassed at your own arousal. You pressed on your bud, rubbing carefully back and forth as your nerves stirred. You closed your eyes, pressing your lips together as you tried to ease yourself into it. The only sound in the room was Steve’s even breaths.

“Now, soldier,” He commanded in a sultry voice, “You don’t stop til you cum.”

“Y-yes, Captain,” You replied in a brittle voice.

You caught yourself falling into your usual habits; dissembling before him. You pushed your legs against the arms of the chair, drawing circles more vigorously around your clit. The atoms more easily flurried, a vortex building within. Your head lolled across the back of the chair, your free hand across your chest as your breath picked up. Streaks of fire formed along your thighs and all once the heat erupted and you moaned as you reached apex; the fall as steep as the climb.

Your hand closed over your pussy as you quivered on the chair. You knew he was there, watching, but you just didn’t care in that moment. You slumped in the chair but not for long as Steve grabbed you by the arm and pulled you to your feet. He turned you sharply as you were off balance, barely able to keep yourself upright in the after waves. He growled as he shoved your shoulder and you were forced to bend, catching yourself on the seat of the chair.

He smacked your ass. You whined and he grabbed your hips roughly to keep you from moving. “You’re quite skilled at that, soldier,” His hand felt around between your legs, guiding his cock along your folds. “You must have a lot of practice.” You dropped your head in shame, holding yourself up against the chair. “Hmm? Do you touch yourself a lot?” He continued to rub himself along your entrance, teasing you. “Every night?”

“I…” You shudder, your arms shaking. “Not every night, Captain…” You bit your lip. Sparks burst up your spine as he pushed just his head inside you. “M-most, though.”

“Mmmmp,” He impaled you entirely at the confession, forcing you onto your tiptoes. You were jolted forward, your elbow bent on the chair as you arched your back. “No self-control at all.”

His hands slid lower around your hips, lifting you almost entirely of your feet as he thrust into you. You moaned, gripping at the cushion as he plunged into you, the sound of your juices filled the room. He was moving your whole body. Your arms shifted on the seat as hips snapped violently against your ass.. You were muttering to yourself as he fucked you, your thighs stung from the force of his relentless thrusts.

“We really have to work on that discipline soldier,” He spoke between shallow breaths, not missing a beat, “You don’t touch yourself unless I tell you to. You don’t cum–” He smacked your ass, “Until I tell you to.”You gritted your teeth as you felt the blooming, your next orgasm rising quickly. You began to tremble and bit down on your hand. “Not yet.” He warned but did not slow his pace. “Not yet.” He warned again and you held your breath, “Ah, ah, ah,” He had you completely off the floor, your legs dangling as he hammered into you.

“Ahhh–Now!” He pushed himself as deep as he could go and you spasmed.  

Your climax burst forth and you dropped your head down on your arm. The ripples coursed through you and Steve quickly picked his motion up, his own groans hinting at his looming peak. He pulled out all too soon and let go of you as he stroked himself urgently. You fell to your knees painfully, legs folded beneath you. Steve grunted as strings of warm cum spilled across your shoulders and you leaned against the chair weakly.

You fought to catch your breath as he seized your hair and pulled you back onto your ass. Your palms met the floor hard as you kept yourself from falling entirely and he bent over you. “That was your warm up, soldier,” He lifted you by your hair onto your feet as he stood straight, “Your real training is about to begin.”


	4. Furlough

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steve makes an announcement but it isn’t good news for everyone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We’ve got some more spicy scary Steve over here and he’s even got his own POV in this one. So let’s buckle in and enjoy the ride.
> 
> Thanks for reading. Please leave a little something in the comments if you can :) <3 Love you guys!!!!

Despite your attempts to appease him, Steve’s open hostility towards you remained. You started to suspect that it was the other side of the coin. He didn’t just want to humiliate you behind closed doors, he relished doing so in front of others. The team was supportive but had given up actively opposing him. The last had almost resulted in a physical altercation between Sam and Steve and another backhanded remark about what was owed to the fearsome Captain. You couldn’t handle it if someone else was hurt because of his loathing for you, so you told them to stop. It wasn’t worth the effort. You could handle his passive aggression; they didn’t know what else you had already dealt with.

The four of you were sat in the briefing room around the long table. Steve had called the meeting and yet he was the last one there. You were about to fall asleep in your chair. It had been a late night. A rough one. After another two weeks of his nightly incursions, you were exhausted. He had only grown crueler. Even as you submitted to his every wish, fled from his ever glare and sharp word, you seemed only to feed his anger. He sought you out; he was with you all the time, even if physically absent. His presence could not be escaped.

The door opened violently and Steve’s footsteps woke you at once. He walked along the length of the table until he stood at the head. His blue eyes flicked to you subtly. Beneath his beard, his lips twitched before his usual scowl set in stone. He glanced around the group and sighed. “Nice to see you all on time...for once.” He put his hands on his hips.

The table shared silent looks of resent. You were all tired of his malicious remarks. He acted as if you were entirely useless. Well, being suspended from duty, you were, but the rest went out and put themselves in danger for the man. The least he could say was thank you.

“What’s with the attitude?” He huffed, “I have good news. Something to wipe the insolence from your faces.” You waited for him to continue. He always did enjoy the sound of his own voice. His prolonged battle speeches and valiant orders. “I was speaking with King T’Challa, the very man who’s provided us this compound, and he has invited the team to Wakanda for the holidays.” He smiled proudly, “Christmas isn’t really part of their culture but he understands that it is a special time of year for us.”

“Oh?” Nat seemed stunned. You all were, truly. It had been a while since there had been an happy news in the compound. You looked to Wanda who was smiling.

“Well, most of us should be going,” He said as he paced around the table. He stopped behind your chair and gripped the back just above your head. “Those of us who have earned a vacation.”

“Steve,” Nat hissed, “You can’t be serious.”

“I can’t deny the three of you have worked hard in the field,” He leaned on your chair so it shifted, “But I mean...a whole month of suspension. That’s like a vacation in itself.”

“You can’t leave her here alone,” Sam piped up, “If you do, I’m not going.”

“Me either,” Wanda crossed her arms. “As it is, Y/N should already we back in the field. We could use her out there.”

Steve rolled his eyes and jolted your chair as he released it. “Fine,” He said sternly, “She can come but she’s not my problem. She’s yours.” You stared at the table as he walked away. “We leave in two days. Six hundred hours sharp. You’re late, we don’t wait.” He paused; tense silence was the only response. “You’re free. Go on.”

You stood with the rest but were stopped by your name. Steve was watching you. You suspected he had barely looked away from you. “Stay. We’ll discuss your suspension.” The others glanced at you and you shrugged at them. A weight settled in your chest. You didn’t like being alone with him. Nat gave a small smile as she followed Wanda and Sam out the door. They didn’t know; couldn’t know. If they did, they wouldn’t be able to change it.

The door closed and you sat back down. “You didn’t think I was really going to leave you here, did you?” He taunted.  _Of course, you didn’t._  He wasn’t going to let you be. It had all been for show. A little game for him. He could never pass up a chance to have you at his mercy. You looked up as him darkly. “Now, now, don’t look at me like that, soldier. You should be thanking me...on your knees.”

You inhaled and tried to wipe the sneer from your face. “Captain, are we going to talk about my suspension or not?”

He chuckled. “Sure, we’ll talk about it. You’ve got one month left.” You bit your cheek, holding back a retort. “I really don’t like the way you’re looking at me right now.” He closed in on you and grabbed your chin roughly. “Don’t worry. We can still have our little exercises in Wakanda.” You didn’t say anything. You just wanted him to let you go.

He removed his hand and stepped away, turning his back to you. “Maybe, if you’re good, I’ll consider ending your suspension once we return. If not, I might just make it indefinite.” He paused and spun back to you, “That’s it. Go. I’m done with you for now.”

You stood. He raised his brows in challenge and you backed away. You left him as he was; victorious. In the hallway, you felt as if you could breathe again. You turned the corner and almost leapt into the wall as you were frightened by another. 

Wanda was leaned against the wall; waiting for you. “So, did he lift your suspension?”

“Not exactly,” You answered. Her eyes seemed to look past you; inside you. “He said he might but I doubt it….whatever, it is what it is.” You shrugged, trying not to show your discomfort. “At least I get to go to Wakanda.”

“His friend is there,” She said pointedly, “Perhaps it will cheer him.”

“Yes, Bucky. Maybe it will.” You tried to smile.

“He is cruel to you,” She narrowed her eyes, “Very cruel.”

“He’s angry at the world,” You said evenly, “Nothing we can do about that. He’ll get over it one day.”

“He shouldn’t treat you like he does,” She asserted and you glanced over her shoulder down the hall. “You shouldn’t let him hurt you.”

“It’s just words,” You lied, looking back to her numbly. “I’ve had worse said to me.”

She stared at you. Measuring you with her crystal eyes. “You’re strong,” She said, “But you’re not alone. Remember that.”

“Thanks, Wanda,” You swallowed. You didn’t want to talk anymore. Couldn’t talk about it anyway. You couldn’t drag anyone else into this. “I guess we should figure out what we’re supposed to bring to Wakanda.”

“Suppose we should,” She accepted your sudden detour warily, “I’ll help you pack. Maybe Nat will join us. She’s always the best at it.”

***

You were the last to board the jet. Steve had opted to drive the Wakandan vessel and you were happy for it as it allowed you to hide in the back. Sam was the first to doze off as Nat and Wanda talked sleepily beside each other. You were too anxious to relax. Steve’s task didn’t keep him from peeking over his shoulder; catching your eye more than once. He would smirk and turn back. You wondered how much he could truly get away with in Wakanda. Maybe there would be a lock on the door;  _but was there any strong enough to stop him?_

You shifted in your seat as the hours went by. You wished you had been left behind. Memories of the previous night flashed in your head. Steve had been as rough as ever; if not rougher. He had almost suffocated you as he pressed your head into a pillow. You could hear his ruts now, the pain in your hips, his flesh slapping against yours. You were tender still. Bruises greeted you that morning along your thighs and hips. Tender as you ran your hands across them.

When at last the jet landed, you hesitated to rise. You waited for Sam to wake up and Wanda and Nat to tease him as the ramp lowered. The three of them disembarked together and you made to follow them, your suitcase heavy as you rolled it beside you. A pinch on your ass made you jump as Steve came up beside you. You eyed him venomously. You didn’t want anyone else to see him pulling shit like that. Worse than them knowing what he was doing was them thinking you were fucking him for your place on the team.

He shrugged and winked. You turned and did your best to walk at a distance from him. He quickly went to the front of the group and led them from the jet pad into the palace below. You looked around, tearing away your worries to admire the marvels around you. Wakanda was beautiful. You could see why it was a long-kept secret. If it wasn’t for your company, you’d want to stay forever.

The interior was even more astounding. The African decor was breathtaking; the bold colours, hand-woven patterns, and finely-crafted ornaments. You could see there was history in every inch of the palace; every bit of it had meaning. It was a statement to freedom; to resilience. 

You were greeted in a sparkling hall by the king, T’Challa, his sister, Shuri, his mother, Ramonda, and their ever-present protector, Okoye. A shadow appeared from the corner as Steve led the entourage and shook hands with T’Challa. Bucky smiled as his oldest friend and you couldn’t help the bile it spiked in your throat.  _Was he worth all this?_

Yet how could you begrudge him Steve’s actions? You knew Bucky; he was nice enough and he been a dependable ally in combat. You couldn’t fault anything he had done. He hadn’t asked Steve to make a stand for him. He hadn’t enlisted you, Sam, Natasha, and Wanda to fight his battle.  _No, that had been the Captain himself._ He was the one in charge as he liked to remind everyone of constantly.

After some overly formal and awkward hellos, you were ready to be excused. You might be able to get away with a nap while Steve was distracted with Bucky. At least get settled in. Your heart dropped however as Bucky neared and you saw Steve talking with T’Challa instead. You needed to get away before he remembered you. You couldn’t very well ignore Bucky to ask Shuri where you could go pass out.

“Hey,” You greeted him and he clapped your shoulder, “So, how’s the countryside?”

“Relaxing,” He smiled, “Lonely, sometimes.”

“Oh, yeah,” Sam ducked into the conversation, “I heard you had a bunch of goats to keep you company. You must fit right in.”

“Eh,” Bucky sneered, “Shut up.”

“You two,” You grumbled, “I swear. This time I’ll let you guys fight. I’m not getting in between this again.”

“Buck,” Steve’s voice kept you from laughing at the pair. He stepped up beside you. You could feel the heat of his body as his arm almost touched yours. “T’Challa says you’ve been working on some stuff in the lab.”

“More like testing,” Bucky explained, “You wouldn’t believe this place, it’s amazing.”

“Yeah, well, I hope we’re not intruding,” Steve kidded, “Believe it or not, it get pretty boring at the compound.”

“I figured this bunch would be getting into all sorts of trouble,” Bucky gestured to you and Sam; Nat and Wanda were just behind you chatting with Okoye.

“Mmm, sometimes,” You didn’t miss the subtle glance Steve sent your way as he answered, “Nothing too bad though.”

“Um,” You leaned back on your heel and looked over your shoulder, “I actually have to go tell Nat something. Totally slipped my mind earlier. Excuse me.”

You scurried away before the tension could become any more intolerable. You couldn’t take Steve standing so close and acting so...nice. He wasn’t nice. He was terrible. You skirted over to Nat and edged your way into their little group. 

“Hey,” You nudged her, “Do you know where we’re staying? I’m exhausted.”

“You should’ve napped on the jet,” She reproached softly, “And I’ll find out. Just be patient.”

“Fine” You sighed and pursed your lips.

You could wait as long as Steve wasn’t hovering over you. You looked over your shoulder at him and he seemed to sense it. He met your eye and the corner of his mouth twitched. You quickly turned back to the others and found another pair of eyes watching you. Wanda squinted but said nothing, drawing her attention back to Okoye. You clasped your hands together nervously. You couldn’t have her poking around. For her own good as much as yours.

***

Steve felt a stir in his pants as he watched Y/N drag her bag behind her. T’Challa was rambling as Bucky approached the lone woman who seemed all to eager to go unnoticed. Along with his arousal was an unexpected flash of anger. He didn’t like her being around other men; not with him near. In the compound it was easy enough, her and Sam were like siblings but something about the way his old friend looked at her had set him off. Her and Bucky had always gotten along. He had forgot about that.

He excused himself from T’Challa as Ramonda approached and walked over to the small group, shouldering in next to her. “Buck,” He greeted. He could feel her next to him. She flinched as he butted into the conversation, “T’Challa says you’ve been working on some stuff in the lab.”

“More like testing,” Bucky offered; it was good to see his old friend happy again. “You wouldn’t believe this place, it’s amazing.”

“Yeah, well, I hope we’re not intruding,” Steve kidded. He focused on keeping his voice light. “Believe it or not, it gets pretty boring at the compound.”

“I figured this bunch would be getting into all sorts of trouble,” Bucky waved toward Y/N and Sam. The chatter of the others in the room buzzed behind them. 

“Mmm, sometimes,” Steve couldn’t help but peek over at her. He was starting to get hard just thinking of their last meeting. “Nothing too bad though.”

“Um,” Y/N glanced over her shoulder as she shifted her weight from one foot to the other, “I actually have to go tell Nat something. Totally slipped my mind earlier. Excuse me.”

Steve watched as she detached herself from the group without pause. She was making a point of not looking at him and it made him bristle. It made him want her. Need her. He turned back to Sam and Bucky as they started arguing about some gadget or another. He could still feel her resistance. Even after all these weeks, she had yet to break entirely.

Her resilience had been what he had first seen in her but now it was growing entirely irritating. She still had those moments of defiance; alone or otherwise. Her eyes burned him when he was on top of her and it fed his own fire. He would only work her harder; bending her body, scalding her flesh with his resent. And with that reserved for others. She was silent these days and yet her face told a story in itself. An unsaid rant towards him. How he had changed... He was still the same man. Still her Captain and she best remember it.

As his erection pressed against the front of his pants he cleared his throat. It was gonna be obvious soon. He sensed movement behind him and glanced over his shoulder. As he met Y/N’s stare, his lips twitched and she quickly looked away. He turned back and crossed his hands in front of him, fingers wrapped around his wrist as he tried to hide his rising excitement. The whole flight he had been thinking of using her. Of commanding her onto her knees.

He was drawn from his descending fantasies when the women behind him dispersed. Shuri began to lead them to the door and Steve hurriedly excused himself. “Hey, I think they’re going to settle rooms,” He nudged Sam, “I’m kinda spent from the flight.” He looked to Bucky, “You don’t mind if we catch up later?”

“No, I get it,” Bucky smiled and ran a hand over his thick hair. “I was just playing around with a new rifle anyway. You guys kinda interrupted, you know?”

“Sure, Buck,” Steve chuckled and playfully shoved his friend’s shoulder, “Later.”

Sam followed Steve as they caught up to the rest, rolling their suitcase behind them. Y/N turned her head slightly, sighting him in her peripherals but did not looked further. Shuri chattered on as she led them through the airy hallways. She stopped suddenly and waved to a breadth of doors along the next. “This will be your wing. There are enough rooms for all of you.” She smiled, “I trust you can figure it out from here.”

“Thanks,” Steve nodded as the princess sidled past him before he turned to his team. He pushed ahead of them and looked at the doors. “Sam,” He pointed to the closest, “Wanda,” The next, “Nat,” He could see Y/N fidgeting as he assigned rooms, “Y/N,” He pointed over his left shoulder, “And I’ll take the last one.” It was directly across from hers. That fact made her jaw clench.

“Jesus, Cap, we’re not children,” Sam muttered.

“Could’ve fooled me,” Steve retorted and spun around.

He marched to his door and opened it, shoving his bag inside. He could hear the others as they followed suit and he turned to watch. Nat and Wanda were almost to eager to be away and their doors shut almost as one. Sam dipped into his room with a yawn, but Y/N remained where she was, her eyes glued to her door. Steve grinned and left his door ajar as he approached her.

“You can share mine,” He smirked as he touched her upper arm and she winced. She drew away from him and grabbed her suitcase. She said nothing as she sidestepped him and finally headed for her room. Steve caught the back of her bag and wrenched it from her grasp, almost bending the metal handle. “I’ll help you with this.”

He lifted it easily, his hand on her shoulder as he guided her down the hall. She tried to shrug him off but he merely dug his fingers deeper. They stopped before her door and she opened it reluctantly. He tossed her bag inside as if it weighed nothing and snapped the door shut swiftly before she could enter. He caught the back of her shirt and tugged her towards his own room.

“It’s a vacation, Y/N,” She tried to dig in her heels as he growled in her ear. She reached back to claw at his fingers and he let go only to grab her by her ponytail instead. “We might as well enjoy our time away.” He forced her through his door as she hissed at the pain in her scalp. He released her gruffly as he shoved her ahead of him and kicked shut the door.

She turned to watch him enter, her shoulders tense as she crossed her arms. He could see the dread as it filled her, mixed with a palour of disappointment. She had thought she could get away from him. That wasn’t how it worked. Steve looked around at the room; it was nice. A tribal tapestry above the king-sized bed; he’d make good use of that. The trappings were finely arranged and he was as impressed as he had been with the rest of the kingdom.

Y/N moved away from him as he paced around and pulled open the curtains and let in the Wakandan sunlight. Every step he took past her or around her, she edged away. He was so hard. He dipped his head through the door on the other side of the bed. The bathroom was immaculate; a large tub drew the eye; more than big enough for two. He reached down to rub his throbbing bulge as he pictured her naked and wet before him. He would have her bent over the marble soon enough.

“How about a bath?” He turned back to the room and found her creeping towards the door. He stormed towards her before she could complete her path. “You think I won’t drag you back here,” He slipped his fingers beneath the belt of her jeans and dragged her close to him. “Now, be a good soldier and get undressed.” He urged her towards the bathroom and released her roughly ahead of him. “I gave you an order, soldier.”

“Yes, Captain,” He grinned as his cock began to ache at the words.

He was close behind her as she entered the bathroom. He tore his tee over his head and began to work on his belt buckle. He blindly undressed himself as he watched her do the same. His eyes went to her hips and ass as she bent to untangle her panties. “Well, get the water going,” He commanded as he stared her down.

Her eyes flicked down to his cock and he wiggled his hips just slightly. She looked away quickly and crossed to the tub. She bent to turn the faucets; a perfect view of her ass and just a hint of her pussy. He didn’t know if he could wait. He was tempted to go over and fuck her then and there. 

She stood as the water began to flow and he was moving towards her in an instant. She braced for him but he passed her by with a chuckle. He stepped into the tub and lowered himself with hands on the marble walls. He sighed as he reclined against the back and ran his hand from his chest to cock; lingering there. 

“Get in,” He ordered and she raised no argument but a shaky exhale. “Turn around,” He directed her until her ass faced him, “Down.”

She obeyed and his large hands were at her waist. He helped her lay over him, his front to her back. He shifted her so that her ass was just above his cock. His tip cloyingly prodded at her folds. His hands explored her body, kneaded her chest and hips, traced the vee of of her pelvis, cupped her ass as she rested weightless over him. He could feel her holding in her moans; her body taut against his fingers.

“Turn the water off,” He said as the tub filled. She gave another ‘yes, Captain’ and sat forward to do as he bid. As she started to lower herself again, he took her by the hips and guided her body to his. He reached down and positioned his sore cock. It was tortuously painful now. He need her warmth around him.He entered her easily; the heat of her walls and the water melded around his length. He groaned as she gave a small squeak. He bent his arms to restrain hers, his hands at the back of her neck. 

“Ugh,” He grunted as he thrust into her, “You’re so tight.” He loved the way she felt around him; so snug, so soft. “You like your Captain’s cock, soldier? You like it when I stretch that little pussy of yours?” 

He could feel her shock as he body stiffened at his words but she only moaned as he pushed himself further. He kept his pelvis flush to her, longing to go deeper though he was at his limit. She took him well.He pulled out and she shuddered. He slammed back into her, the water rippled around them, and she squeaked. He loved that noise. 

“Tell your Captain how much you like his cock. Tell me you love my cock.”

She closed her eyes, her head falling to the side. “I love your cock, Captain,” Her voice was wispy. She was fighting it. Fighting both him and herself.

He carried his motion, his thrusts growing closer together as his cock pulsed against her walls. He needed the release. The water splashed around them as he hammered into her and let go of her arms to pull her legs up around her chest. It opened her more to him and he could feel himself bottoming out in her. Her hands went flat against the sides of the tub and she tried to measure her breaths but they soon grew chaotic.

“You gonna cum for your Captain?” He hummed and she whimpered. “Did I say you could cum yet?”

“N-no,” She gritted her teeth against his merciless pounding. “No, C-c-c-captain.”

“Your Captain wants you to cum,” He growled, “Cum for me, soldier.”

He held her legs as she tried to straighten them, her muscles strained and suddenly released as she orgasmed. Her pussy clenched his cock over and over as the strangled cry rose from her. He didn’t stop. Couldn’t stop as he felt himself nearing his own climax. Before he could, she was orgasming a second time and it forced him to follow as her pussy milked him. He filled her with a deep snarl, his hot ribbons snaking around his cock as he rode out his peak.

He stilled her body atop his and she twitched around his cock. He didn’t remove himself as he basked in the afterglow. His breath rasped out as he brought his hands up to free her hair from her sagging ponytail. He brushed his fingers through it, “You like it when your Captain cums in you?” She shook her head and sniffled. She wiped her eyes as she hid her face from him. “What was that, soldier?” His hand paused on her head.

“No, Captain,” Her voice cracked, “I’m not...I’m not...protected.” His hand fell from her hair and she sat up swiftly. Her warmth left his cock as she climbed off of him. He could see his cum floating in the water as it leaked from her. “I have no birth control.” Her eyes stared at the white strings in the tub.

Steve’s cock twitched at her admission. Even after such a violent release, he was ready for more and her words made him hard again. The thought of her possibly being pregnant didn’t bother him as much as he thought. In fact, it incensed him. He sat up in the tub and grabbed her wrists, drawing her back to him. 

“You think I give a fuck?” He sneered, “If your Captain gives you his cum, soldier, you say ‘thank you, can I have some more?’”

He lifted her by her hips and slipped into her, her hands beat against his muscled stomach. He brought himself to his limit and kept her there. He savoured the feel of her around him. He took her head between his hands and forced her to look at him. Her eyes were panicked; fearful. He had broke her at last. 

“Do you want more, soldier?”

Her lips pressed together and her eyes swum for a second before she swallowed back her despair. “Yes, Captain,” She said weakly and he felt her pussy pulse. He could’ve cum at that very instant.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The reader struggles to relax on her vacation.
> 
> Warnings: non-con/explicit sex, violence, mentions of birth control/contraceptives. Obviously 18+ (like this whole blog)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so this got fucking crazy. It starts out slow but I promise, it is worth it. Drama, smut, darkness! Omg, thank you guys for your patience and I hope this was worth the way. Love you ❤
> 
> Thanks for reading. Feel free to comment with your thoughts! :)

Even upon returning to you room, you were not to meet with any sleep. You were still tender and mortified. Steve had used you so easily. The more you allowed him to bend and contort your body to his whims, the more it tore you up inside.  _What had happened to the man you had once respected?_ Something was missing inside of him. And you couldn’t help the tremor every time you thought of him cumming inside of you. Of the possibility that he would linger within you.

You sat on the floor beside the ebony dresser carved with tribal insignia. You unpacked your bag into the drawers as the sun rose just outside your window. You felt so numb and yet there was a pain deep inside of you. You stood as you closed the drawers and changed into the outfit you had set aside. A billowy blouse and torn jeans. You did your best to look human in the mirror and slipped into a pair of flats.

You stared at your door before you found the will to open it. Your hand slowly turned the handle and you clicked it shut carefully behind you. You listened for any noise of your team. You neared Steve’s door and pressed your ear to the wood; you could hear his sound snores from the other side.  _Bastard._ He was entirely unfazed by what he was doing to you. A bitterness settled on your tongue and you walked quietly down the hall.

You found your way to the throne room by chance but only after getting lost several times. You were surprised to find Shuri there. She was staring out the windows of the palace onto the mosaic of wilderness mixed with industry below. You neared her and she swore in her own language as you spooked her; your reflection appearing just beside hers in the glass. You smiled meekly and tucked your hands in your pocket.

“You’re awake early,” She grinned at you in the window, “I’d thought you and the rest would be sleeping off your jetlag.”

“I’ve always been an early bird,” You returned, “I was actually hoping to ask you something. Um, or someone. Not really sure who to ask.”

“That’s what I’m here for. To answer questions. If it’s not that white boy in my lab prodding at my work, it’s my brother.” She chuckled.

“I was hoping to travel around the city today…just for an hour or so. Cooped up in that compound…” You stared down at the colourful streets. “I’m getting a little stir crazy.”

“Ah, yes, I can get you a car. And my brother had your credentials prepared. They’re in the lab waiting for you.” She turned to you at last. “It must be hard; leaving it all behind for the solitary of that place. I told my brother, it was little more than a prison. So boring.”

“I’ve found that the friends you lose are worse than any material,” You said solemnly, “Some things you know you can never get back.”

“I think you and the white boy would get along. You’re both rather pessimistic,” She shook her head, “Why don’t you come with me and I’ll get you sorted.”

“Thank you,” You followed her as she turned away. She flicked her fingers over her shoulder for you to follow and you did so eagerly. A couple hours away had only been a fantasy; the last you clung to in surviving the horror of your reality.

-

Wakandan currency, a fake passport, a map, and a mod to Google translate and you were ready to go. A car awaited you downstairs and you slid into the back with a suppressed sigh. You felt almost free even if you knew it wouldn’t last. You asked the driver to take you to your first and most important destination and wrung your hands eagerly. When he stopped, you stepped out with a thanks and stared up at the pharmacy. That at least resembled its western counterpart.

It was a full five minutes before you worked up the courage to enter. You looked around the shelves of beauty products and medicinal aids. You walked down the center aisle and meekly approached the pharmacist’s counter. You neared with a nervous smile, waiting behind the other customer as you clutched the thin strap of your purse. 

It was your turn and you stumbled as you stepped up to the counter. “Um, I…is there any way to request a private consultation?” 

“Certainly,” The woman smiled; her braids twisted back in a ballerina bun. “Come with me, hon.”

Her English was clear and you were relieved that you didn’t need the app to understand her. She led you to a small room and assured you that the pharmacist would be in soon. You sat in the clinical white chair and shook your leg. When at last another woman appeared in a white coat, you greeted her in a small voice and she closed the door behind her.

“Hello, I’m Anula. How can I help you today…?”

“Y/N,” You introduced yourself, “I, uh, I, well, I’m sure you can guess that I’m not from around here and I wasn’t sure even if you could help…”

“I can try,” She smiled warmly, “Do you have a passport?”

“Y-yes,” You unzipped your purse shakily and held out the document provided by Shuri. She took it and read it over carefully.

“You are a guest of the king,” She turned to the fourth page; a large stamp with a panther’s head on it.

“I am,” You confirmed softly.

“Anything you need would be covered under the Crown’s hospitality.” She assured you.

“Even without a prescription?” You wondered.

“If it is required, we can arrange a doctor’s visit within the hour,” She offered, “Really, we are not so strict as America. Our healthcare is here to care, not to profit.”

“I…I need birth control.” You admitted shyly; your voice didn’t feel like your own. “And…Plan B, if you have it.”

She nodded but not judgement marred her face. Her expression was that of understanding. “Easy. We can have the birth control readied within twenty minutes. Just a few questions first and the Plan B is not a problem at all. I’ll have my staff put it together at once.” She stood and offered her hand, “You don’t have to be afraid. Not here.”

-

You swallowed the pill at the counter and left with slightly less anxiety. You hid the rest of your haul in your purse and walked along the street as you stopped in the local shops. You paused to watch the traffic and rush of people around you. You could just disappear. You laughed at yourself darkly and continued to the corner to meet the driver. Steve would find you, you knew that.  

By the time you returned to the palace, your head was achy and your stomach had begun to roil. You thanked the driver again and dragged yourself up the royal stairs. Inside, you traversed the maze as best you could and eventually found your way back to the throne room. From there, you could recall the path Shuri had led you along last night.

Wanda turned the corner at the same time as you and you nearly took her out as you grabbed onto each other. She giggled and you tried to but the unexpected run in had only spiked your already fragile nerves.

“I’ve been looking for you!” Wanda greeted in her subtle accent, “Nat’s in the common room with Shuri. She wants us to play some games with her.”

“Oh?” You raised your brows and resisted the urge to touch your stomach. You felt sick. And tired. “I don’t know. I’m exhausted.”

“And yet you went running around Wakanda,” She mused, “What were you doing anyway?”

“Just…exploring. As much alone time I’ve had during my suspension, doesn’t really feel like I’m alone, you know?” You spoke quietly.

“I know,” Her hands clung to yours, “But you shouldn’t always be alone. Please…for me. You can just watch.”

“Okay,” You gave a reluctant smile, “You know I can’t deny you.”

“I know,” She preened.

“I’ll just put my purse away and catch up to you, okay?” You slowly untwined your fingers from hers.

“Alright, I’ll walk slow…” Her eyes washed over your features before she finally stepped past you. “You better catch up.”

-

You sat on the long sofa as Shuri, Wanda, and Nat moved along with the figures on the television. You would’ve loved to play but you felt like shit. You were mostly just tired and quite tempted to fall asleep on the couch. Instead you just leaned on the arm and yawned. After Shuri came out the victor of the Shakira battle, Nat turned to you with a mope.

“Come on, Y/N, just one song,” She pleaded. “Maybe it will wake you up.”

You squinted at her and sighed. You definitely felt like a party pooper. You hated it. These last months you had been shrouded in gloom. You just wanted to enjoy life again; even if it was something as small as a round of Just Dance. You dropped your shoulders and grinned. You pushed yourself to your feet.

“Fine, where’s my controller?” You asked and Wanda smiled over Nat’s shoulder.

You took the small controller, slipping on the wrist strap, and lined up with the rest. “No, not Despacito,” You argued as Shuri began flicking through the catalogue.

She settled on some Lady Gaga instead, “Fine. Something a bit more palatable for you.”

You started moving along with them as best you could. For someone trained to fight, you weren’t the most co-ordinated. You blamed that on your lack of rhythm and sleep. You were really starting to enjoy yourself as you forgot your eventful arrival the night before. You ignored the movement you sensed at the other end of the room, lost in the rhythm and shared giddiness. The song ended and Shuri gloated again as she came out on top.

“Shit!” Nat’s natural competitive nature was starting to boil over. “I swear. You’re cheating.”

“Or you’re getting a bit rusty,” Sam taunted and you turned.

He stood just inside with Steve and Bucky at his shoulders. The three were thoroughly amused by the scene and you would’ve dropped your controller if it wasn’t for the strap. Steve’s eyes were on your formerly swinging hips and you knew he had seen a few too many of your ill-timed moves. You unhooked the strap from your hand and set the controller aside. You looked away, trying to avoid a direct stare down only to catch Wanda’s pale eyes. Slowly she peeked over at Steve and you saw the thoughts swirling.

“You four are like the second coming of the Spice Girls over here,” Sam teased as he crossed the room.

“And it looks like Scary just showed up,” Nat countered.

Steve and Bucky trailed behind; the former moved like a predator. The warmth of his gaze lingered on you. You crossed your arms and kept your distance. You edged closer to Wanda and whispered as you turned your back to the room. “I think I’m going to lay down now.”

She nodded, her eyes still glued to Steve. “I’ll come with you. Just to make sure you’re alright.”

“Wanda–”

“I insist,” She looked at you at last. “Come on.”

You waited as Wanda excused you and followed her to the door. In the hallway, you walked in silence, picking blindly at your nails.

“I don’t look into peoples’ heads anymore. I don’t like it.” She began quietly. “But I can still get a sense of what’s within. It doesn’t take my powers to see there is something going on.” Your eyes were wet as she spoke and you gulped. You couldn’t talk; wouldn’t. “Tell me and I can help you. We’ll all help you.”

She stopped short and turned to you. Your eyes were stuck to the carpet. “I can’t…”

“Even if you don’t tell me, I know. Something isn’t right.” She touched your elbow gently, “What has he done to you?”

“I let him do it.” You raised your head, staring her down defiantly as a single tear slipped down your cheek. “I can’t stop him and neither can you.”

Her face paled and her fingers gripped your arm. “Oh, Y/N… I can.  _We_ can.”

“No. I don’t want you to,” Your lip trembled. “This isn’t your problem. It’s mine and–” You inhaled and shook your head, “I don’t want everyone to know what he’s done. It’s humiliating.”

“I won’t tell them then, but I can stop him. Please.” You lowered your head and her hands cradled your chin, forcing you to look at her.

“If you do, he’ll make me leave. You too. We’ll all have tossed it away for nothing.” You croaked. “At least when he’s out there, when’s he’s leading the team, he’s saving people. What is my life against theirs.”

“He’s not the only one helping–”

“Don’t! Okay! Don’t you understand? If I do anything, I’ll be left out in the cold. All alone.” You pushed her hands away. “And what do think will happen to you? You think he’ll let your little tryst with Vision continue? He’ll find a way to tell Tony.”

“That doesn’t matter. You’ll have me and no one could ever keep me from Vis.”

“No, he could. That’s what you don’t get.” You backed away. “Wanda, if you’re my friend, you’ll just let it be. I’ve enough regret on my shoulders.”

You spun and marched away from her. You could feel her watching you. The tears spilled freely as you turned the corner and you sniffed them back as you wiped them away.  _How had everything become so fucked up? Why did you always have to fuck things up so entirely?_

-

There was a knock at the door after the windows had grown dark. It was late. You had heard the doors of the others as they had returned for the night. There wasn’t a second knock. The door opened unanswered and you didn’t need to roll over to see who it was. Steve’s heavy footsteps neared the bed and he huffed as he stared down at you. You stayed still beneath the covers with your back to him.

“There’s a pool on the other side of the palace,” He sat down and the bed dipped beneath him. His thick hand was on your hip, “Hot tub, too. Thought you could use a few laps, soldier.”

You didn’t respond. You didn’t move. You just laid there.

“You know the rules,” His voice deepened, “Keep it up soldier and I’ll have you running down the halls.”

“Yes, sir,” Your voice was small as you rolled onto your back. You pushed yourself up carefully as you faced him.

“Why’d you leave so soon today?” He asked as you draped your legs over the edge of the mattress.

You looked at him sharply as you stood. “Are you serious?”

He chuckled and grabbed your arm. He dragged you towards the door as he spoke. “No, I just like watching you squirm.”

“Wait, shouldn’t I get a bathing suit?” You tried to plant your feet but only tripped yourself. He kept you from falling and opened the door with his other hand.

“You won’t need it,” He smirked and pulled you into the hall. The door closed behind you just as swiftly and you were struggling to keep up with his long stride. You were still half asleep. Irritable even.

“Stop,” You tried to wriggle free of him, “I can walk by myself.”

“Oh, are we gonna be mouthy tonight?” He clung to you even tighter as he pulled you onward. “Because I can put that mouth to good use.”

“Just, Jesus Christ, let me just walk,” You planted your heels and were surprised when it drew him to a full stop. “Please.”

He turned and looked you up and down. You were tired and worn out. You just wanted to feel like your body was still your own. He rolled his eyes and shook his head. He grabbed your forearm and shoved you ahead of him. “Then walk, soldier.” He ordered as you stumbled.

You righted yourself and pushed your shoulders back as you walked. You weren’t sure where exactly you were going. At the corner, Steve directed you with a single word, “right,” then “left,”; his directions carried on through the halls until you reached a pair of carved door which glowed with an unnatural lustre. “Inside,” He commanded.

You reached out and slid your fingers through the handle and pressed inward. Within was a sparkling pool of water at the centre of the room. There was a lounge area along the far wall with reclining beach chairs and a round table with chairs. At the other end of the pool, was a smaller basin; steam rising from its core. The door closed behind you as Steve followed you inside.

As you stood admiring the ethereal glow set by the windowed ceiling upon the room, two hands rested heavy on your shoulders. “You’re tense,” Steve remarked. You could hear the smirk in his voice. You withheld your dry retort of him being the reason for that and instead lowered your chin. “The steam should loosen you up.”

You drew away from him as you crossed your arms. It was laughable that he should even pretend to care about you. Painful even as you recalled those days when you truly thought he had.  _How could you have known those years ago that this valiant crusader would become so corrupted?_

“I thought we were past this, soldier,” Steve was close again. His hands were on the hem of your shirt. “But I’m always up for a fight.”

You sighed and remained as you were. “Sorry, Captain.”

“Very good,” He pulled your shirt up your torso and you pliantly raised your arms.

The loose tee was easily lifted over your head and he dropped it at his feet. He grabbed the waist of your pajama shorts and you resisted the urge to fold your arms across your bare chest. He tugged the shorts past your thighs and they fell naturally to the floor. You were entirely naked before him; a familiar vulnerability swept over you. The strength left your limbs and you closed your eyes in shame.

“Your turn,” He grabbed your wrist and turned you to face him. You stared up at his dark eyes; they used to be so bright. “Undress me, soldier.”

You reached over numbly and pushed the cotton up his stomach. He stooped to help you get it past his arms and shoulders, the tee discarded with your own. You were eager to be done with the ritual but he caught your hands and placed them on his broad chest. Your palms were pressed to his firm muscles and he held them there. Slowly, he slid your hands down his torso and you struggled not to pull away.

“You’re already wet, aren’t you?” He asked as he stopped your hands at the low belt of his pajamas. He removed his hands and nodded. “Go on.”

You gulped and pulled the elastic past his erection carefully. You bit down as you contemplated letting it snap back at him. That wouldn’t be good. _Not for you._  You rolled his pajamas past his thighs and let go. They puddled at his feet and he stepped out of them. He pressed his cock to your stomach, “Touch me.”

Your eyes went to his stomach; frozen there as you brought your hand blindly to his cock. You ran your fingers along his length and gripped him firmly. He shuddered and his hand wrapped around yours. He guided you up and down a few times as his breath came in dusky growls.

“Come on,” He pulled your hand away from his cock and clasped it in his. He led you along the polished geometric tile toward the steamy hot tub at the end of the room. He released you and nudged you ahead of him. “Get in.”

You cautiously neared the brim and dipped your toe in. You descended the underwater steps one at a time as the hot water embraced you. Despite your company, it was welcoming. You just wanted to sink under and never emerge from the depths. Your feet met the bottom and you crossed to the ledge which lined the basin’s perimeter. You turned and sat, the water moving noisily around you.

Steve’s eyes were on you, his head lowered in predatory observation. The corner of his mouth twitched and he descended into the tub with a splash. He sat on the bench across from yours and spread his thick arms over the edge of the hot tub. He hung his head back and sighed. Your legs and arms crossed without thought.  _What was he doing?_

“Just relax,” He lifted his head and peeked at you with one eye. “It’s nice, isn’t it?”

Slowly, you tried to do as he said. You dropped your arms to your side and set your legs side by side. You stared at him as he just sat there, totally at ease, as if unaware of your presence. Despite the soothing waves of the jets and warmth all around, you just couldn’t relax. The more you watched him the angrier you were. You thought of your conversation with Wanda; of the shame that still burned in your spine.  _What if someone were to stumble in here with a similar idea as Steve? How would you explained the two of you skinny dipping so late at night?_

Your shoulders were just above the water and you peered down at the distorted vision of your body. You turned your hands palm up and tried to trace the warped lines along them. You didn’t feel like a person anymore. This man across from you had made you feel like nothing more than air. You weren’t truly there; a part of you had broken. The same part of him that had fractured, only in a different way.

The water shifted suddenly and you looked up just as Steve pushed through the water. He settled beside you, his arm stretched behind your shoulders. You stiffened and raised your head. You focused on the far wall; willing yourself to drirft away. His hand was on your cheek; his wet fingers left a trail down to your jaw, then your neck, and along your collarbone. His heat added to that of the water as his fingers crawled beneath the surface.

He nuzzled your neck as you fought to stay still. His teeth grazed your throat, tickled even, before he bit down. The sharp twang caused you to grunt and you pushed against his head desperately. 

“Stop! Don’t!” You could feel him sucking, your flesh throbbing. He cupped your breast and finally let go. You knew there would be a purple welt left in his stead. You reached up to touch the teeth marks which framed the blemish. “Why would you do that?”

“Because, you’re mine,” He rasped into your skin as he rested his head against your shoulder. He toyed with your breast as he spoke; kneading pinching, and tweaking. “Wanda knows, doesn’t she?” You swallowed but didn’t answer. “But you told her not to do anything, right?” Again, silence. “Right, soldier?”

“Yes, Captain,” You whispered.

“She’ll mind her business if she knows what’s good for her and the robot,” His hand slid down your stomach, “You’ll keep her from doing anything stupid.”

“Yes, Captain,” You gritted out as he pushed between your legs.

“Good,” He pressed two fingers against your clit and held them there. He applied more pressure as he raised his hand and breathed in your ear. “I can feel how wet you are.” He dipped his fingers lower and you felt it too. “It’s all for me, isn’t it, soldier?”

“Y-yes,” You stuttered out as he dragged his fingers back to your clit.

His rough fingertips flicked back and forth and your thighs tingled. His breath was hot on your cheek as he played with you, caressing you gently only to deepen his touch. When you were ready to dissemble, he let off and slowly built you up again. He drew circles this time and you bit your lip as you tried to hide your face from him. His other arm wrapped around you and he pulled you close so that his lips were flush to your temple.

As the tension spiraled around his fingertips, he retreated again and you grunted without thinking. He chuckled, his free hand was on your head as he held you even tighter. “Do you want to cum, soldier?” He asked. “Hmm?”

“I…Yes, Captain,” You said breathily.

“Then ask,” He snarled.

“May I cum…Captain?” You forced out as his fingers kept a delicate pace.

“Mmmm,” He purred, his fingers sped up and you gasped. “Yes, you may, soldier.”

Your back arched as he stirred your nerves and the tensity met a fever pitch. Your hand was on his thigh without thinking, your nails digging into his flesh as you came with a suppressed moan. He didn’t stop until you were shaking against him. You felt so weak; so helpless.  _Why did your body do this to you? Why did you allow it to?_

Steve’s body rippled the water as he moved. He came up in front of you as he spread your legs wide. He lifted you as he brought his knees up onto the bench. He reached down to align himself with your legs splayed around his thick torso. He rubbed his cock along your folds before pushing inside and you sank back against the ledge. He pressed himself to you, your shoulders against the lip of the tub as he impaled you entirely.

You were trapped between him and the wall of the tub. His arm bent behind you as he began to work in and out of you slowly. He bent his head and nuzzled your hair, inhaling you as he picked up his pace. A rush of water added to the whirlwind as you were rested just in front of a jet. You moaned and braced the side of the tub as Steve rutted into you in sharp jolts. His grunts filled your ears as he covered your body with his. You felt as if you were suffocating against him.

Steve thrust deeper and harder into you. The water splashed around him noisily and mixed with the animalistic noises that rose from both of you. Your walls were trembling, clenching around his cock as you came again. Your entire body shook as you were caught in a cluster of delight and detest. He slowed and his motion grew more deliberate.

His pelvis rocked against you in long thrusts and his head dipped down beside yours. He groaned, a gravelly rasp in your ear, and you felt his release. He bottomed out as he spasmed erratically. He leaned against you heavily and stilled, his breaths deep and throaty. You trembled and your heart raced. Your lungs felt as if they were filled with rocks and your body locked up.

“Get off!” It was a thin croak. “Please, get off of me.” You pushed on his shoulders. “Get off!!” Your voice only grew louder as the panic swept over you. “Steve, get off of me!”

He sat back, still inside of you as he caught your hands as you struck out at him. “What the fuck?” He tried to still you but you couldn’t stop. “Get a hold of yourself, soldier.”

“No, no, no,” You twisted your arms away from him. “I can’t–can’t—breathe.” You clutched your chest.

“Shh,” He made to pull out but only pushed back in again. “Let me calm you down.”

“No!” A wave of anger came over you as quickly as the panic.

This time, you didn’t miss. Your fist met with Steve’s jaw and his cock slipped out of you as he staggered. You brought your legs up and kicked him away from you. You struggled to push through the water and evade him but he latched onto you swiftly. You swung around with your elbow and caught him in the mouth. As he stumbled, you shoved him and he caught himself on the edge of the tub. You acted without thinking; you grabbed a hank of his dark hair and bashed his head into the raised lip.

You let go and retreated without looking behind you. He groaned and rolled over so that he was sat limply on the bench. His head lolled and blood ran from his lip and eyebrow. You covered your mouth as you blindly climbed the steps. Slowly his hand came up to hold his battered head. The adrenaline coursed through your veins and you searched around for your clothes. You dressed clumsily as you rushed across the room.

You could hear the water move and you knew he would come after you. You ran to the door and glanced back. Steve gripped the side of the tub as his other hand cradled his head. He was unsteady but not unable. You pulled open the door and dash out into the hallway. Your wet feet clapped on the floor as they echoed away from the pool room; away from Steve.


	6. Dishonorable Discharge

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The reader must make a decision; fight or flight.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so we’ve come to the end of this series. (read the post script). A lot had happened and now we must accept what has come of it all. I hope you all enjoy this finale. Love you ❤
> 
> Thanks for reading. Feel free to leave a comment :)

Your heartbeat rang in your ears as your footfalls filled the rhythm. Your entire being buzzed as you twisted and turned through the dim corridors of the Wakandan palace. Your knuckles still stung from the strike across Steve’s jaw and your nerves flurried with the reality of what you had done.  _What did you do now? Where could you go?_

You slid to a halt, out of breath as you almost fell against Wanda’s door. You leaned on the wood heavily and tapped softly but frantically as you hissed. “Wanda, Wanda, please. Let me in. Wan–”

The door opened and you toppled over as it did. You grasped your chest as you tried to catch your breath. “I’m sorry but–but I did something. I–” Your voice cracked in your throat.

“Come on,” Wanda gently touched your elbow and beckoned you inside. She closed the door, the lock clicked before she turned back to you. She put a hand on your back and led you to the love seat which faced an artificial hearth. “Tell me what happened?”

You sat and chewed your lip. Your hands shook and Wanda reached out to caress your raw and swollen knuckles. “You hurt him?”

“I think,” You rasped, “I was so afraid, I didn’t…I don’t know why I did it.” She turned your hand over and twined her fingers through yours. “He’s going to kill me.”

“No, he won’t.” She promised, “Not so long as I’m here.”

She stroked your hand before she released it and stood. She left you for a moment and disappeared into the adjoined bathroom. She returned with a small box and sat beside you. The glow of the lamp on your other side limned her features remarkably. She opened the metal kit and set it between you. She daubed the split between your first and second knuckle with a cotton swab, the blood drying out quickly. Your entire hand throbbed.

“You should sleep,” She said quietly.

“No, what if–What if he comes looking for me?” You watched as she closed the box and tossed the used swab into the small bin beside the carved desk. “I couldn’t live with myself if he hurt you, too.”

“He can try,” She spoke in venomous tone as she neared again. “Now, you must rest.” Her hands cradled your face as she tilted your head to look you in the eye, “I promise, you will be safe.”

Her thumbs rested on your temples and a warmth seeped along your skull. Your eyelids sagged and your body went limp across the love seat. You fell into a deep slumber without another thought of Steve and your impending doom; Wanda’s gentle grip was the last thing you felt.

-

When you awoke, a pillow had been placed under your head and your legs were bent beneath a thin fleece blanket atop the short love seat. Despite its size, you were rather comfortable and for the first time in months, you did not awake more tired than the night before. The curtains were closed and the fireplace glimmered with artificial flames. Your vision slowly cleared as you looked around the room and memories of the night before flashed before you.

You sat up with a jolt and glanced around the room. Only early morning shadows and emptiness. You pushed the blanket off and stood. You checked in the adjoined washroom to find it just as vacant. You backed away and searched for any sign of Wanda. The small clock glowed in bright blue numbers; 10:34. It was later than you thought. Rarely did you sleep past six or seven,

The door handle turned and you turned to watch it open. Wanda entered with a smile, a covered plate in her hands. “You’re awake,” She greeted, “I brought you some food.”

“I…thank you,” You were confused. She acted as if all was well. As if you weren’t hiding from an enraged psychopath. She set the plate on the desk and waved to the chair.

“You should eat. You must be hungry,” She swept across the room and gently touched your elbow, “It’s very good. Some Wakandan spices I’ve never tasted before.”

“Wanda…” Your breath was barely a wisp.

“It is okay, Y/N,” She squeezed your elbow before releasing it, “He is hurt, that is certain. But he has done nothing.”

“Nothing?” You echoed.

“Please, sit, eat,” She urged, “Once you are finished, I will tell you.”

You sighed and reluctantly sat at the desk. You uncovered the plate of warm hash and a generous serving of scrambled eggs. There were some dark herbs and green veggies mixed in and the fluffy eggs were rich. You ate carefully at first but your appetite soon had you scraping the plate clean. Wanda offered you a glass of water as you chewed and you happily accepted. When at last you were done, she spoke.

“He did not make it so far as your room last night. Not even his own,” She explained, “They found him just outside the pool room. A servant discovered him in the corridor. He has a nasty bump and gash right along here,” She drew a line along her hair line. “And his lip is a bit swollen but he is otherwise intact.” A small grin curled her lips, “Everyone thinks he slipped on the tile…and he has not told them otherwise.”

You blinked at her in shock. “He didn’t…but…you know he will come for me.”

“He will not get you,” She vowed, “Not again. Not ever.”

“You don’t get it, Wanda, there is no place left for me. Not here, not back in the compound.” You brought your hands up to brace your neck as you felt the fire along your spine. “You can’t protect me.”

“I can and I will. This is not the man I swore my fealty to. I promised to fight for those who need it and I can do so without the noble Captain America,” She spat.

“No, I won’t have you throw it away. Not for me.” You pleaded, “This is my problem. Let me deal with it my way.”

“You’d ask me to stand back and watch him do this to you?” She asked, “I cannot do that.”

“No, I am asking you to let me make my own decision.” You countered, “It’s over, Wanda, I promise. I only ask that you let me end it myself.”

Her blue eyes sparkled as she looked you over. You stood and neared, taking her hands in yours. You flinched at the pang in your knuckles. She gave a sad smile. “Okay,” She relented, “I will let you do it your way…Take care of yourself.”

“I’ll do my best,” She drew you into and embrace and you welcomed it. It was the first ounce of love you had felt in months. The first time you had been touched without malice; resent; anger. “Thank you, Wanda.”

-

Shuri  _had_  offered her help. Thus you felt better when you ventured down to her lab and pulled her aside. Still, you felt as if you were leaning too heavily on her hospitality. Steve was your problem, not hers. You should deal with him yourself  _but how had that worked out for you so far?_  On your way down to the lab, you had dreaded running into him and dodged behind several statues thinking you heard another coming your way. Your paranoia was near crippling. You couldn’t live like this any longer.

You hadn’t offered her details. You hadn’t said much really. You had only asked that she procure you a jet for midnight. It would be enough time for you to prepare but not for Steve to catch on. Your chest filled with butterflies as you shook her hand and left her just as you found her. There was a wisdom in her young eyes. She may not know the situation exactly but she could see desperation as plain as day.

You walked along the curved path which led from one part of the lab to the next. Bucky was sat at a table tinkering with a gun as a wrinkle deepened along his brow. He looked up and you waved to him. The less time you spent here, the better.  He waved back and smiled. You left him to his work and quickly found your way out to the hall; anxious to pack for your midnight escape.

You didn’t make it to the first corner. The last person you wanted to see appeared as he so often did. Steve’s left brow was swollen, a large purplish bruise from his hairline to the top of his eye. There was a gash along the the top of his forehead, fresh stitches woven through his flesh. You blanched and came to a sudden halt. He stopped and stared you down; his jaw tensed as he looked back at you.

You broke the standoff as you stepped back and spun around on your heel. You didn’t get more than a couple feet before he was on you. He grabbed your arm and shoved you against the wall, barely missing the nearby statue of a sleek wildcat which stood guard along the corridor. You wriggled and tried to free yourself from his grip, your fist was caught before you could meet with his injured face. He was ready this time.

“Not so fast, soldier,” He snarled, “I’ve been looking for you.”

“Fuck you,” You spat, “Get off of me.”

“You think you’re going to get off that easy?” He hissed as he forced your wrists against the wall beside your head. “You think you can just run away from me? Hooo, girl, you’ve got a lot to learn. You don’t even know the kind of shit you’ve just rained down on yourself.”

“I’ll scream,” You threatened, “And then I’ll tell everyone how you really got that little bruise of yours.”

“I dare you too,” His lip curled dangerously. “Go on, scream.”

You held his eyes as he called your bluff. You sighed and tugged on your wrists but he did not budge. “So what are you going to do? Bend me over right here in the hall?” He chuckled and released your wrists. He stayed close, looming over you so that you could not brush past him.

“My room, twenty-one hundred hours. Sharp,” He growled, “If you manage to get there on time, I may not leave you worse than you left me.”

“I’m going to kill you one day,” You whispered. At first you didn’t think he’d heard you but slowly his brows raised, a wince of pain as the stitches strained against his flesh. “You know that? I’m  _going_  to.”

He tilted his head, his jaw twitching as his pupils dilated with anger. “Not if I kill you first, you insolent little–”

“Steve?” Bucky’s voice scared you as he stood just outside the lab. “Hey.”

Steve backed away suddenly as if he hadn’t just been promising your death. He smiled, the shadow that had come over him dissipated in the air. He smiled at Bucky, “Hey, I was just on my way to see the king but I’ll be by the lab shortly.” His old friend seemed unfazed by the scene he had come upon, “Y/N was just asking about all this.” He laughed as he gestured to his face.

“I’d say it’s an improvement” Bucky joked, “And no rush. I’m still trying to figure out this stupid rifle.” He pointed over his shoulder through the lab door. “Take your time.”

“I won’t be long, Buck,” You watched as Steve patted Bucky’s shoulder and sidestepped him.

Silence pervaded the hallway as you watched the blonde super soldier march away. You were still against the wall. It was your only support. You were certain you would have crumpled to the floor without it. Finally, you glanced at Bucky who was staring at you in concern. The smile he had worn for his old comrade had faded.

“You okay?” He asked as he neared you. “What was that about?”

“Just wondering what happened to him,” You lied grimly as you turned to him. “Quite a number he did on himself.”

“Yeah, must’ve been a hell of a fall,” He remarked, “Managed to land completely on his head. No scrapes or bruises on his arms or legs. Just…” He ran a finger along his forehead, “The head.”

You stared at him. He knew it wasn’t a fall. It had been easy enough to guess. You shook your head and looked away in shame. “Yeah, it must’ve been.”

“I don’t think I’m worth it.” He said quietly. “Everything you’ve sacrificed. All of you…him.” You looked back to him as he hung his head, “I’m sorry. It’s my fault, all of it. I don’t deserve any of this. You don’t–Whatever he’s done to you, it must be horrible.”

_Were you so transparent?_  Your heart seized and your lip trembled. 

“Bucky…It’s not you, it’s him. He’s different now, I–I don’t know you as well as I should, but I know you were worth it. You deserve your life; happiness, if you can find it. You seem to have found that here…I just need to find mine.”

“You’re leaving.” He said plainly.

“I have to,” You replied in a small voice.

“I know you do, I just…wish it didn’t have to be like this. I was hoping–” He shrugged and sighed. “I’ll help you. I owe you that at least. I’ll keep him from stopping you.”

“You don’t have to–”

“Let me help, please. Just once, I wanna help.” His eyes wandered to your hand as you played with the hem of your shirt, “You must pack quite the right hook.”

“Not really. Good leverage,” You answered with a gulp. “Can I ask one more favour?”

“Anything,” He smiled. It was bittersweet. Forlorn, even. Things could’ve been different. You could’ve been friends. More than just fugitives in the same sinking ship.

“Help him. Help him find himself again.” You said, “I know he’s still there. The man I swore to follow. If he can help you remember, you can help him. I know it.”

“I hope he’s still there,” Bucky frowned, “I…Take care of yourself, Y/N.” He held out his hand and you accepted it. “I’ll tell Shuri to get the jet ready as soon as possible. He won’t wait till midnight.”

You let go of his hand and nodded. You made to turn back down the hall but stopped yourself halfway. “Does everyone know?”

“Just me,” Bucky assured, “I can tell when someone’s trapped. I’ve been there.”

“Please, don’t tell anyone.” You whispered.

“Your secret’s safe,” He tucked his hand into his pocket and looked over his shoulder at the lab door, “Now, you get out of here. I’ll keep him busy as long as I can. I’d say twenty minutes before he’s down with T’Challa, I can distract him for maybe an hour more.”

“Thank you, Bucky,” You felt the tears pooling along your eyelids as you turned and headed down the hall. They spilled as you turned the corner and a weight lifted from your chest. Even if it wasn’t truly freedom, you were free…almost.

-

You didn’t bother packing. You didn’t have the time or the necessity. The others were exploring the city and you were thankful that there were none to witness you sprint through the halls. The only thing you took were your passport and a hoodie. Everything else could be thrown away; phone, clothes, a single book you had brought for the flight. This life was over. You were growing used to leaving everything behind.

You checked your watch and said one last silent goodbye to the team. You stopped outside Wanda’s door and bowed your head. She was strong. She’d take care of everyone. They were all stronger than you. You exhaled and carried on. You kept to the halls on the opposite side of the palace until you found the staircase. You followed the steps until they stopped.

As you came up to the jet pad, the ship was fueling up. Shuri awaited you. You approached her as you waited for your cue.

“Five minutes, at most,” She said, “They don’t know, do they?”

“No,” You shook your head, “But I have to go.”

“Just know, there is always a place for you in Wakanda. Even without them.” She smiled kindly and touched your shoulder. “You don’t have to do this.”

You stared at her. She knew exactly where you were going. She didn’t need to ask. To be so wise at her age. Perhaps you’d never had ended up here. “Thank you, but I do.”

“The soldier will miss you.” She commented and you winced. “Not the Captain, the Sergeant. He…was happy to see you again.”

“If I’m lucky, it won’t be forever,” The jet door slowly began to descend and you glanced over in unison with the princess. “I don’t think the sentence for treason is that medieval these days.”

“I hope one day to see you again,” She looked back to you, “In happier times.”

“I hope so too, Princess.” You bent your head before you stepped away from her.

“Shuri,” She corrected you as you walked away. “Goodbye, Y/N.”

You walked up the ramp of the jet and took the seat closest to the pilot. It would be a long flight but you would not sleep. You knew that. You would rather watch the clouds as you enjoyed your last moments of liberation. As you fastened your belt, the pilot peeked back at you, his hands working expertly at the controls.

“Where to, Miss?” He asked, his accent made the words a melody.

“New York,” The words fluttered from your tongue and floated in the air before you.

-

You stared down at your worn passport. Your real one, not the fake one Shuri had forged for you. You examined the photo of you, though it was hard to believe it was you looking back. You felt older now; different. Everything had changed and you had not been immune to the passing of time. The girl in the picture had been young; hopeful. She had just been enlisted to work for  _the_  Captain America.

And now this fractured woman was running from him. You lifted your eyes to the looming giant. Stark Tower was as you remembered it. As lively as ever even if it had lost several of its former regulars. You inhaled the urban stench of the city and sighed. You listened to the sounds of traffic, the endless stampede of pedestrians, the whoops and out-of-tune music of panhandler. You put one foot up on the bottom steps and snapped closed your passport.

You pushed back your shoulders and urged yourself up the stairs. You slipped through the revolving door and past those rushing like ants around the lobby. You crossed to the elevator and a cloud of deja vu came over you. You remembered the first day you had ascended these heights. The first time you had stepped off on the very top floor. You almost felt the same twinkle of glee, though this one was far less bright.

As the doors opened, you were blinded by the fluorescent hues. You let out the breath you had been holding and forced yourself out of the elevator. You approached the round desk where the receptionist sat and you laid your passport before her.

“My name is Y/N and I have come to turn myself in for crimes of insubordination.” You declared. A shadow appeared in the corner of your eye and you turned to a familiar red-head in the doorway just to your left. James Rhodes appeared at Pepper Potts’ shoulder, the two of them in visible shock. Your lips curved just slightly before you spoke again, “Is Tony in?”

 

**the end (for now)**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For this series, I have opted to divided it into two overarching plots. In this first ‘book’ we will call it, we have watched the descent of both our reader and Steve Rogers following the fall out of Civil War. I feel comfortable in leaving this first installment as it stands as I focus on other fics in the meantime. I am content that we have a beginning, a middle, and an end which will allow us to put this down for the time being.
> 
> This first ‘book’ will be known as Insubordination and the second, which will not be complete for some time, is yet to be titled and will likely not be seen before the end of 2019. But I can say that it will take place during the events of Infinity War and Endgame and will bring us to our eventual and final end. I thank everyone for their time and patience. You have been wonderful!

**Author's Note:**

> Warnings: dub/non-con and explicit sex (penetration, oral, and some toy play). Obviously 18+ 
> 
> If anyone’s interested, I’m doing a raffle on my tumblr for five lucky readers for fics of their own. The contest can be found here: https://darkficsyouneveraskedfor.tumblr.com/post/184037591549/a-celebration
> 
> I’d love any comments and feedback. It means a lot and helps me out as a writer to know people are reading and even enjoying what I’m putting out. (Also, I had fun with this so I might even consider a sequel). So, here ya go! Some dark!Steve for y’all.


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